“Hiss—”
When Shangguan Xiyue saw things had quieted down, she walked over—only to catch sight of my fingertip drenched in blood.
“You silly girl, you’re hurt and don’t even react?”
I slowly raised my head, eyes dazed and confused.
Seeing me like this—spaced out and barely functioning—made Shangguan Xiyue even more furious.
With a tone that could burn steel, she grabbed my small hand and dragged me toward the infirmary.
“You two… you knew each other from before, didn’t you?” she asked while pulling me along, finally unable to hold back as she looked at my vacant, absentminded expression.
I pressed my lips together.
I didn’t want to talk to anyone right now.
Seeing my reaction, Shangguan Xiyue already had her answer.
In the infirmary, the doctor cleaned the wound, applied anti-inflammatory ointment and healing salve to my fingertip.
I stared down at my finger, gaze lowering slightly.
“…Thanks.”
After some time in silence, my state had improved somewhat.
Though my voice was soft, Shangguan Xiyue heard it clearly.
She understood that I wasn’t in the best mood and didn’t hold my earlier attitude against me.
“How long have you known each other?” she asked.
“Ten years.”
“Huh?” Shangguan Xiyue was completely stunned.
She had assumed that at most the two of us had some past entanglement, but never expected we’d known each other since childhood.
If that were the case, then why had Su Liumeng even transferred money to her to help play matchmaker?
My mood was extremely complicated right now.
Part of it was because of Su Liumeng, but even more so it was due to the Su family—everything I’d believed about my life and identity had been predetermined long ago.
That overwhelming sense of powerlessness from being controlled behind the scenes wasn’t something an eighteen-year-old girl like me could just process overnight.
I wasn’t some impossibly mature person.
I’d have to grow and learn through experience, just like everyone else.
Facing Shangguan Xiyue’s concerned gaze, I managed to force a smile—not a great one, but not awful either.
“I’m okay. Just give me a bit of time alone.”
She patted me on the shoulder.
This classic “manly gesture of approval” somehow felt strangely appropriate between me and Shangguan Xiyue.
She had long since fully accepted my current identity.
“It’s almost noon. Want to go to the cafeteria together?” she asked as we walked out of the infirmary side by side.
“…Better not.” I replied distractedly.
“I’m really not in the mood these days. I’ll just go back to the dorm first.”
Shangguan Xiyue hesitated for a moment, then agreed.
“Alright. You head back first. Your health is still important. If you get too hungry, just order some delivery.”
Given my current state, I probably wouldn’t be able to eat much anyway.
Forcing it would be meaningless.
I stood outside the dormitory building and waved a small hand toward Shangguan Xiyue.
During this time of day, the dorms were fairly lively.
While most of the new students were out, many upperclasswomen also lived in this building.
I could sense quite a few eyes secretly watching me.
Ever since the events of yesterday, I’d gained a certain degree of notoriety here at Beiqing.
After all—making Su Liumeng, the infamous eldest daughter of the Su family, cry and then walking away as if nothing happened?
That wasn’t something you saw every day.
*****
Dorm 514.
I lay slumped over my desk, motionless for quite some time.
Creak—
Li Mei had returned to the dorm.
She came rushing back from the cafeteria, her military training uniform completely soaked in sweat.
She had hurried back to squeeze in a quick midday shower.
Being on your period and sweating buckets during training was pure torture.
Her eyes lingered for a second or two when she noticed the outfit I had on—clearly not part of the military training uniform.
Is Xu not participating in the training?
Li Mei wondered silently.
Well, it made sense.
In her eyes, I was just a pampered young lady from a privileged background—someone who’d surely have her ways of avoiding military training.
A delicate heiress like me wouldn’t be expected to tire herself out with such things, right?
Little did I know that while I lay on my desk in a spiral of emo thoughts, I had once again been silently labeled as a “pampered rich girl” and silently roasted behind my back.
The sound of water trickling from the bathroom slowly pulled my thoughts back from the void.
Li Mei?
She’s back?
I shook my aching head and struggled to climb back onto the bed.
Five minutes later, Li Mei stepped out of the bathroom and began hanging up her freshly washed clothes.
There were only two sets of military uniforms.
After changing out of one, the other needed to be washed.
Li Mei had a timid and sensitive personality.
She’d learned from a young age how to read the room.
“Are you feeling unwell?” she asked gently.
Standing at the foot of the bed, she glanced at my small bare feet dangling slightly in the air.
Without a hairdryer, she could only awkwardly towel-dry her short hair over and over.
I slowly turned my head to glance at my roommate.
“There’s a hairdryer in my cabinet. You can use it.”
With that, I rolled over and lay on my side again, my face turned toward the wall.
Clearly, I wasn’t the only one having a rough day.
In my state of overwhelming frustration and emotional chaos, I had completely forgotten—there was still a terrifying ghost fetus inside my belly.
At that moment—
In a surge of extreme frustration, she suddenly opened her eyes, as though fully assuming a human form.
In truth, she hadn’t even developed proper eyeballs, let alone eyelids.
This so-called “form” was nothing more than a projection of her conscious presence being awakened.
“Xu! Xin! Yan!!”
“What is it this time?!”
The ghost fetus’s wailing scream echoed louder and louder inside my mind, bouncing off the walls of my brain like a banshee’s shriek, with an underlying layer of exasperation that words couldn’t fully describe.
“Have you seriously never read the pregnancy manual I gave you?!”
She was about to be driven mad by me.
Suddenly, as if something had occurred to her, the fire of her anger gradually receded.
She had read the manual too.
Naturally, she knew what it said.
Pregnant women were naturally affected by hormone fluctuations during pregnancy, making their emotions especially sensitive.
That was why so many women became easily overwhelmed during this period, constantly needing reassurance and comfort from their partners.
Just now, she had suddenly realized—her mother was a single parent, already living a difficult life, and had no one to soothe her emotional turbulence. With that thought, the resentment she felt faded like mist.
Or rather—it didn’t disappear.
It transformed.
There was no one to comfort her…
Then she would do it.
In that moment, the ghost fetus completed what could only be described as a “self-conversion.”
As a literal biological daughter, she mysteriously developed what could only be described as a sense of filial responsibility.
Listening to the scolding from the little ghost, I felt a chill run down my spine—
Oh no.
How could I forget about this tiny terror?
My body trembled out of pure instinct.
That fear of her had become deeply ingrained. I was still racking my brain trying to find a way to smooth things over when—
Suddenly, I heard her voice turn soft—almost gentle.
“Did something happen today… that made you upset?”
My jaw nearly dropped to the floor—wide enough to fit an entire watermelon.
The ghost fetus… changed?
Ever since she found out I wanted to abort her, she hadn’t shown me a shred of kindness.
So what in the world was going on today?
The ghost fetus keenly sensed the shift in my mood. Realizing her tone had suddenly changed so drastically, she felt a strange mix of embarrassment and irritation.
Her voice suddenly rose—
“W-Who cares about you anyway?! I just thought, y’know, as a single mother, your life must be kinda hard… so I was just trying to understand, that’s all!”
She pouted a little, finally convincing herself of this logic.
Who would care about this awful woman anyway?
She definitely hadn’t forgotten the fact that Xu Xinyan had sneaked off to a hospital to try to get rid of her.
“……”
A row of black ellipses lined up in my mind.
I became a single mom… and whose fault do you think that is?
Of course, I didn’t dare say that out loud.
The fact that the ghost fetus’s attitude had shifted—
That she was beginning to see things from my perspective—
This was undoubtedly a good sign.
I secretly let out a sigh of relief.
Looks like all my effort hadn’t been in vain.
“If you’re really feeling overwhelmed,” the ghost fetus continued, “you could cry it out for a bit. It’ll help. You’ll feel a whole lot better afterward.”
Then her tone suddenly turned sharp, even vicious:
“Or—just point the way, and I’ll kill that person for you. Problem solved.”
“No, no! That’s really not necessary,” I quickly waved her off.
What Su Liumeng had said had left an impact.
At the very least, I no longer saw her as an enemy.
Killing her?
I absolutely couldn’t do that.
The ghost fetus could clearly perceive the fluctuations of human emotions.
Right now, she was trying very hard to process my complicated mix of feelings.
Sadness—
Caused by someone—
But not wanting to kill them?
This was—
What kind of twisted love-hate entanglement was this??
Her not-quite-formed little eyes seemed to stretch and widen in a way that was oddly human, filling with disbelief and shock.
She had a gut feeling—
She was getting very close to the truth of the situation.
So that meant…
Her biological mother… was about to start dating someone?
A strange and speechless sense of helplessness welled up inside the ghost fetus.
And with it—an odd, unexpected flicker of resistance, like she was suddenly not okay with becoming less important.
She never would’ve guessed it.
But this…
This was mother-daughter bond taking root.
The beginning of something quietly blooming—
A daughter’s possessiveness.
Even if she’d never once called me “mom”…
Even if she hadn’t fully accepted that word in her heart…
The fact remained—
Xu Xinyan was, biologically and undeniably, her mother.