(I)
The rain treated the umbrella like a drumhead, tapping out its own rhythm upon it. Ripples spread through the puddles on the road, splashing high as cars sped past, taking a long time to settle back into stillness.
Many breakfast shops took advantage of this special day to sell Qingming Dumplings. Just looking at that soft green color was enough to make An Jing feel a cloying sweetness in her mouth.
But these things were mysterious; even though she felt they didn’t taste good every time she ate them, she couldn’t help but crave the flavor every year when she saw them.
In her imagination, they held the fragrance and freshness of spring grass, yet in reality—there was only the unchewable glutinous rice skin and a red bean filling so sweet it could kill.
An Jing stepped along the curb where no water had gathered, glancing at the pedestrians buying Qingming Dumplings. She couldn’t help but think of that ancient poem that every elementary school student knew.
“I ask, where is a tavern to be found? The Herdboy points far off to Apricot Blossom Village… but there probably aren’t any herdboys anymore, right? At least not in small cities, and you almost never see oxen plowing fields. If someone wanted to find a place to drown their sorrows in wine, who should they ask?” An Jing thought, her mind wandering slightly. “I can’t just flag down a car to ask for directions, can I? Oh right, I could ask a sanitation worker.”
The place where they met every day drew closer. An Jing saw that familiar figure holding an umbrella. She instinctively quickened her pace, carefully avoiding the other’s line of sight to approach stealthily from behind. Then, with a ‘pah’ sound, she pressed her hand onto the girl’s shoulder: “Xiao Ying!”
“What? It’s Xiao Jing. Scaring me isn’t that easy.” “Aren’t you going to sweep graves with your parents?”
“They don’t need to go.” Zhu Ying put her hands on her hips. “My grandparents on both sides are all alive and well, and we don’t have an ancestral grave at all. We just need to burn some paper and offer prayers at home.”
“That’s quite relaxing.”
“What about Xiao Jing? You have such a large family, why don’t you have to go?”
“This is the first year of the grave relocation, so we can’t go.” An Jing pulled out a pack of cola-flavored gummies she had just bought at a roadside shop, opened them, and held them out to Zhu Ying. “Apparently, we can’t go next year either, but I’m not entirely sure.”
“Sweeping graves for a large family must be a big hassle, right?”
“Actually, it’s alright. The whole family just gathers together, heads up the mountain in a big swarm to burn incense and paper, sets off some fireworks and firecrackers, and then we come down in a noisy bunch. We have lunch together at noon, and then everyone starts leaving one by one in the afternoon…”
“Oh~ I’ve actually never been grave sweeping before, or at least not in such a formal way.” “Customs vary from place to place, but in the end, it always involves lighting incense and burning paper.”
“Right, I bought a few Qingming Dumplings when I came out today. Tada~!”
“Whoa, you actually managed to find white ones.”
“They looked cute, so I bought them. But I always feel like if they’re white, they don’t count as Qingming Dumplings anymore—they’re just ordinary little snacks.”
“Yeah, Qingming Dumplings are definitely more authentic when they’re green.”
“It’s just that these white ones have meat filling, so I wanted to try them.” Zhu Ying closed her umbrella and squeezed under An Jing’s, naturally hooking her arm.
“They even have meat filling?” An Jing held the umbrella a bit higher. “You’re dressed so thickly today.” “Because the temperature dropped. On the other hand, Xiao Jing, you’re still wearing such thin clothes. Aren’t you cold?”
“I’m not cold. It feels pretty warm.” An Jing puffed out her chest. “Maybe yesterday’s Acupuncture and Massage was effective.”
“Is your body really okay? Was the examination very rough?” “…It was very thorough. I wouldn’t call it gentle, but it definitely wasn’t rough.”
“You must have been scared being examined alone, right?” Zhu Ying gently placed her palm over the back of An Jing’s hand that was holding the umbrella. “How about you just give me up? Then I can go with you for the next examination?”
“There’s absolutely no need for that. Besides, your ability isn’t something you can completely control yourself.” An Jing bumped her forehead against Zhu Ying’s cheek. “Who would volunteer to be a lab rat?” “But if I’m with you, you won’t feel lonely anymore.”
“…But I’d worry about you, and that would make things even more troublesome.” An Jing lowered her voice. “I’m keeping my superpowers a secret for now to avoid creating more trouble. They only know that I can perform Dream Entry and use mind reading.”
“I couldn’t tell, Xiao Jing can be quite cunning sometimes.”
“That’s not being cunning, it’s being smart.”
An Jing pouted: “Speaking of which, you didn’t really just want to go to Wang Wang’s House to play on a whim, did you?” “Hmm—as you know, I occasionally hear Xiao Ru’s inner voice.” “Yeah, so did you hear something?”
“Although the information I perceived was very fragmented, I’ve pieced together a vague feeling.” “What kind of feeling…?”
“There might be some changes in her family..”
“Huh? You mean, her parents’ business might have gone bankrupt and they owe a huge debt?” “It might be more serious than that.”
“It… it couldn’t be that they’re dead, right? Money is still being sent over every once in a while.” “Hmm… I can’t say for sure. Regardless, I just feel like her mood suddenly becomes very low sometimes, and she seems to be worried about something.” “You want to help her?”
“If it’s really some adult matter, I won’t be of much help. However, I can at least let her see some bright colors in her grey days, can’t I? After all, I am her friend.” Zhu Ying rolled her eyes and leaned a bit closer to An Jing. “Besides, she definitely still has feelings for you. If I bring you along, she’ll be even happier.”
“Don’t put it… so bluntly.” An Jing nervously pinched the hem of her clothes.
“People should be more direct with each other, especially with a relationship as close as ours. So, you have to love me a little more. See how generous I am.”
“Cough… of course I, love, love…” An Jing was like a jammed cassette tape, repeating one word many times before finally muttering in a tiny voice, “I really like you…”
“Why wasn’t it ‘love’!”
“I… I’m embarrassed to keep saying that word!” An Jing gave a dry cough and turned her head away, scratching her burning cheek. “Be a bit more subtle, be a bit more subtle, okay?”
“Che—I prefer a more direct Xiao Jing!”
“How direct do I have to be… why don’t you demonstrate?”
“It’s like this—I love, love you!” Zhu Ying also stuttered a bit.
“That’s weird.” “Is not.”
“Anyway… anyway, I won’t betray you, as long as you don’t leave me.”
Zhu Ying nuzzled An Jing’s nose with her cheek: “Rest easy. No matter who I leave, I won’t leave Xiao Jing.”
***
(2)
In the shops along the street, pots of blooming flowers were displayed, mostly white or yellow. Every blossom looked as beautiful as a fake flower, but when one got close, the faint floral scent was clearly detectable.
Qingming Festival always seemed to require such flowers. Or rather, if no one bought these flowers to commemorate the deceased, it felt as though it wasn’t really Qingming anymore.
The roadside shops grew fewer until they gradually turned into open fields. The lush green rice paddies were soaked by this gentle spring rain, and the rustling sound they made when the wind blew was like their cheerful laughter.
Zhu Ying, who was rarely not wearing a skirt, squatted by the roadside and gently stroked a cluster of small flowers blooming there. They looked like they were of the same species, just with different colors.
“What’s wrong?” An Jing asked curiously, tilting her umbrella slightly.
“I just think they’re cute, so I wanted to touch them. Do you want to try, Xiao Jing?”
“Uh… you shouldn’t just touch wild flowers and grass on the side of the road, especially the ones that grow so well. Someone or some animal must fertilize them often.”
“Fertilize…? Eek?!” Zhu Ying stood up abruptly.
An Jing continued explaining from the side: “After all, you see, flowers and grass near utility poles always grow better because dogs often pee there… and there just happens to be a utility pole right here.”
“Why didn’t you say so earlier?”
“You squatted down too fast…”
“Whatever. It’s raining anyway, so anything dirty has been washed clean.” “Well, I don’t kno—Whoa, you’re touching my face directly!”
“Heh heh, now Xiao Jing is the same as me.” “Hey, hey…”
“What? There’s no smell. If you don’t believe me, smell it. There’s only the scent of flowers.”
“…It’s stinky.” “That’s just psychological.”
“Tsk…”
***
(3)
The road ahead finally turned into a wide national highway.
Looking out, the green mountains and fields were connected. A few birds were temporarily perched under a lush cedar tree, grooming their feathers. Suddenly, a loud blast echoed from the distance, startling them into flight as they dashed into the blue smoke permeating the rain.
The faint smell of sulfur and saltpeter could be detected in the air. However, unlike the overwhelming smell of gunpowder during the Lunar New Year, it wasn’t heavy. It was light, seemingly mixed with the fragrance of green grass, giving off an understated sense of weight.
Sweeping graves during the Qingming Festival often means that the deceased has been gone for a long time. In many cases, those who come to pay their respects have long since grown accustomed to the other person’s absence. They no longer wail loudly, but only feel a bit low in spirits.
And the longer they have been gone, the blurrier the memories become. In the end, one might not even be able to recall the other’s appearance, or the specific details of past events. Eventually… even that hazy sorrow, sweetness, beauty, and happiness are forgotten.
Sweeping graves becomes a habit—letting off some fireworks with smiles and conversation, taking a rare chance to gather with those still living, chatting about an unclear future, talking about a blurred past…
The Qingming Festival is said to be a festival for the dead, but it is actually a festival for the living.
“I suddenly feel like the Qingming Festival isn’t really any different from the Lantern Festival.” An Jing, who had been dazed, showed an expression of sudden realization.
“…Those are two completely different festivals, okay?”
“No, actually the purpose of both is to bring friends and family together. After all, those who have died are dead after all; those who are alive are what’s more important…”