At that critical moment, from behind the three giant dragons, an old man with a completely different style slowly walked out.
He was Si Zhanglao, the only elder in the Silver Dragon Clan who could perfectly take human form, a sly old fox well-versed in human law, diplomatic rhetoric, and the art of shifting blame.
Si Zhanglao wore a sharply pressed black tailcoat, a monocle, and carried a civilized cane, looking like a particularly elegant human gentleman.
He adjusted his monocle, walked to the front of the two armies with a benevolent expression, and waved his cane as he shouted.
“Stop! Stop! Everyone! Calm down! We can talk things out—fighting is bad for your health! This Dragon’s Nest is an ancient relic; if it breaks, repairs are expensive!”
The Sheng Nu in her archangel form and the Jingling Nüwang, though imposing, were momentarily stunned by this sudden civilized man.
Si Zhanglao seized the opportunity to squeeze out a professional fake smile and began his dizzying performance of twisting the truth.
“Our little princess here, although, uh, a bit lively, and her personality is a bit unrestrained, and she tends to act without thinking about the consequences, deep down she’s a good kid!”
Look, she kicked over the divine statue—that shows she has her own opinions and isn’t superstitious!
She traveled thousands of miles to the Holy Temple to check on the Sheng Nu’s health—that shows she really likes humans! She’s promoting racial harmony!
She crashed the Jingling Gongzhu’s coming-of-age ceremony and forcibly kissed the princess—that was to train the princess’s adaptability and also bestow the dragon clan’s blessing on her! What a thoughtful intention!”
Yisela nodded vigorously, her eyes welling up with tears of excitement as she looked at Si Zhanglao.
‘He understands me so well! I never thought Si Zhanglao, who always tricks me out of my gold coins, could be this reliable in a critical moment QAQ. I have to get some gold coins from Da Zhanglao’s treasury to give him later.’
The Sheng Nu trembled with rage, the holy light on her scepter humming with intensity.
“You call that promoting harmony? That’s harassment! That’s blasphemy against the Holy Light of the Divine!”
The Jingling Nüwang also roared.
“She kissed our princess unconscious for two hours! You call that training adaptability?! And blessing?”
For a moment, the dragon elders scratched their dragon feet in embarrassment.
Si Zhanglao glanced back at Yisela, who was trembling behind them, her cultivation completely lost, then looked at the group of alien top-tier combatants he clearly couldn’t defeat.
Although the dragon clan was protective of their own, they couldn’t really start a war with them.
His eyes rolled, and a brilliant idea came to him.
Si Zhanglao suddenly sighed, putting on a pained expression as he said to Yisela.
“Your Highness the Princess, although you are the hope of our Silver Dragon Clan and a genius rarely seen in ten thousand years, the trouble you’ve caused this time is far too great. The divine has placed a curse on you—you’ve now lost the power of the Dragon God’s bloodline.”
Yisela was taken aback, not yet processing.
“Huh? So? Are you going to avenge me?”
Si Zhanglao’s face changed abruptly. He pointed at the Sheng Nu and the Queen and spoke earnestly to Yisela.
“Since you’ve lost your power, you are no longer worthy of staying in this sacred Dragon’s Nest! To express our dragon clan’s ‘apology’ for this incident, and to allow you to ‘reform yourself,’ the Council of Elders has made an emergency decision!!”
Da Zhanglao suddenly lowered his head, bringing his massive dragon snout close to Yisela, exhaling a puff of hot air.
His voice carried a hint of barely detectable relief.
“Child, just go in peace. The outside world is wonderful. Sister Sheng Nu will teach you how to be a human! Oh no, how to be a dragon. Auntie Jingling will teach you manners. This is all for your own good.”
Yisela.
“‘??? Wait! Aren’t you here to rescue me?! What’s with that expression like you’re finally getting rid of a nuisance?!'”
Si Zhanglao quickly pulled a pre-written document from his chest: the Silver Dragon Princess Foreign Assignment Apology.
No, it was the Study Abroad Agreement. In the blink of an eye, he slapped it onto Yisela’s forehead, then grabbed her from behind the dragon claws and tossed her like trash at the feet of the Sheng Nu and the Queen.
Si Zhanglao gave the Sheng Nu and the Queen a standard business smile, rubbing his hands together.
“Ladies, here is the most honored princess of the Silver Dragon Clan. She possesses the Dragon God’s bloodline and extraordinary talent.”
“Although she has a few flaws (referring to her lost cultivation and bad personality), she makes up for it with cuteness (meaning easy to bully), and she feels great to the touch (the dragon scales are smooth). Now, she is your ‘apology gift.’ Please accept delivery.”
After saying this, he added.
“Oh, and a friendly tip: the divine edict says she’s been cursed by a succubus and requires frequent cuddles and hugs to maintain her vital signs—otherwise, she’ll cry in front of you. That’s a value-added service. No need to thank me.”
BAM!
Da Zhanglao slammed the Dragon’s Nest gate shut with a sweep of his tail, the speed so fast that not even a speck of dust remained.
Yisela was left lying in the open, clutching the Agreement in her arms, watching the Sheng Nu and the Jingling Nüwang approach step by step. She stood frozen in the wind.
Staring at the tightly shut gate, she screamed in despair.
“You old bastards! This is fraud! I’m going to report you to the Dragon Association! Da Zhanglao! I burned your beard! Er Zhanglao! I threw away your dentures! San Zhanglao! Your…”
From inside the gate came Da Zhanglao’s furious roar.
“Hurry! Activate the clan protection array at maximum power! Don’t let her piss off the Sheng Nu again and come back to destroy the house! And hide all the treasure and gold coins! That spendthrift girl will definitely blab about them again!”
Yisela (inner thoughts).
‘You old bastards! When I regain my power, I’m going to pluck out all your beards!! And glue your dentures to the ceiling!!’
The Sheng Nu smiled gently, crouched down, and pinched Yisela’s cheek.
“Hee hee, little princess, no one’s protecting you now.”
The Jingling Nüwang ground her teeth and grabbed Yisela by the dragon horn.
“Come on, come back with Auntie to the forest. Auntie has prepared a lot of ‘fun’ things for you—like a full-body treatment using the sacred tree’s sap, so you can truly experience what ‘purity’ means.”
Yisela stared at the two demonic faces closing in and let out the most miserable scream since she had transmigrated.
“Help!! Dragon clan fraud!!”
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