“Was that what scared you guys into screaming?”
The girl followed our gazes to the cockroach she had just stomped to death.
Her name was Xu Liya, and the reason she had a spare key to my place was that she was my landlord’s daughter.
The thought that such an embarrassing moment was witnessed by a girl made me want to crawl into a hole and disappear!
“N-no… not at all. It was clearly my idiot dad who was scared the whole time, freaking out over a mere cockroach.”
“Hmph! I wonder who it was, hiding under the blanket with me, trembling like a leaf!”
“W-who was trembling?! I was clearly just worried the cockroach would crawl into the blanket and scare you again.”
Ugh… why does it sound so unconvincing even to me?
Xu Liya cut us off, her gaze landing on the silly little girl beside me.
“Alright, alright, stop arguing, you two. By the way, little Guiye, can you tell me who this adorable cutie is? She looks so much like you but seems younger. Could she be your sister?”
“Hmph, not a sister!” The little girl huffed, crossing her arms and tilting her head proudly, looking… well, like an idiot.
Facing Xu Liya’s curious look, I glanced at the little kid beside me, unsure how to explain.
“Uh… this is my… dad?”
“Hey! You jerk, what’s with that questioning tone?!”
“D-dad?”
Xu Liya stared at the loli beside me, utterly baffled, her expression mirroring mine when I first learned this silly kid’s identity.
A little loli claiming to be someone’s dad…
“So, I’m really Guiye’s dad, hmph!” Probably annoyed by Xu Liya’s skeptical look, the little loli turned her head away with a tsundere huff.
Seeing the little girl’s pouty, angry demeanor, Xu Liya quickly apologized.
“Oh, uh… I see. Sorry, my bad for assuming. I’m the landlord’s daughter.”
“Whatever, I’m not gonna fuss with a woman.”
Xu Liya looked at the haughty little loli, a faint smile spreading across her face.
“Now I believe you’re Guiye’s dad. You two really have the same personality—tsundere and adorable.”
Huh?
I haven’t even met her since my reincarnation, so how does she know my personality?
Wait, that’s not the point!
The point is she thinks I’m like this silly loli?
No way!
“Who’s like this silly loli?! Her tsundere act is just plain dumb. How could anyone think we’re alike?”
“You calling me a silly loli?! Keep talking, and I’ll pin you to the bed so you can’t get up!”
As she spoke, the little loli suddenly lunged at me, a faint milky scent wafting over as her surprising strength knocked me down, pinning me beneath her.
“You idiot, let me go, you tsundere silly loli!”
“Still calling me that? Time for punishment! Tsundere silly loli, take my tickle attack!”
With that, she placed her tiny hands on my neck and began her ruthless tickling assault, making me gasp and giggle uncontrollably.
“H-haa~ S-stop… not there! I surrender, don’t… don’t tickle! H-haa~ P-please, let me go!”
“Surrender’s no good! The more you beg, the more excited I get!”
Not only did she not stop at my pleas, but her nimble fingers sped up their tickling on my neck.
“P-please, let me go! It’s… it’s getting weird! H-haa~”
“No way! Next, I’m attacking your armpits!”
Her hands left my neck, only to target my armpits next.
“S-stop! Not there either! Please, let me go, I can’t… can’t take it!”
“Ahem!” Xu Liya coughed awkwardly, her eyes darting elsewhere as she reminded us, “Um, I’m still here, you know.”
Realizing how inappropriate this was, the little loli finally stopped her assault and climbed off me.
“Sorry, I forgot. Hehe~”
“You are a tsundere silly loli! I’m just stating facts, so why’d you tickle me?!”
This kid is beyond saving, isn’t she?
Doing something like that with someone else around!
“How am I a tsundere silly loli? You’re the tsundere silly loli! Your whole family’s tsundere silly lolis… ugh, that includes me too. Argh, whatever, you’re the tsundere silly loli!”
“Hmph!” x2
Xu Liya looked at us, a helpless smile spreading across her face.
“So cute. You two tsundere silly lolis probably haven’t eaten yet, right? How about I make dinner for you both later?”
Ugh, I’m not a tsundere silly loli!
“No way!” x2
The two of us spoke in unison, rejecting Xu Liya without a hint of tsundere… really, not a hint!
As I always say:
I, Guiye, would rather starve, die out there, or jump off this building than eat a single bite of your food!
I, Guiye, would rather perish of hunger, keel over in the wilderness, or plummet from Everest than accept charity food!
—Excerpt from The Chronicles of Triumph: Guiye
…
“Ugh~ So hungry. There’s nothing to eat, Nighty.”
The little loli looked at me, her big, watery eyes blinking.
“Hmm… oh! We’ve got sour beef noodles. I’ll order two sticky lemon teas too.”
I ran to the bed and pulled out an unopened box of sour beef instant noodles.
“We’ll eat this tonight, okay?”
The silly loli didn’t respond, but her stare made it seem like I was some kind of alien.
I tilted my head at her, puzzled.
“Nighty, do you have some weird fetish or something?”
“What do you mean?”
“Sour beef noodles aren’t enough for you, so you’re ordering foot-stink lemon tea too? Both reek of feet—double the foot stench when you eat them.”
“That bad, huh? Guess we don’t have anything else to eat.”
I looked at the instant noodles in my hand.
Since she said that, and I don’t really know much about this stuff, she’s probably right.
I reluctantly put them down.
“Ugh…”
Hearing me, the little loli flopped onto the bed like a salted fish who’d lost all hope.
But then, as if struck by an idea, she perked up.
“How about we go mooch dinner off that girl from earlier? She did invite us.”
“But we already turned her down.”
“No biggie! In situations like this, just act cute and beg a little!”
“Why are you so good at this?!”
Judging by her behavior, she’s probably a seasoned pro at this.
No wonder Mom wants a remarriage.
“Hmph, you go if you want. I, Guiye, will never accept charity food!”
Gurgle~
Right after I said that, my stomach let out a loud protest… ugh, why now of all times?!
Whatever, even if I’m starving, I won’t go.
I said no, and I mean no!