About an hour ago, Ellaria was lying alone on the bed in her Single Dormitory, her golden hair spilling across the pillow, emerald eyes gazing up at the ornate yet hollow ceiling, her thoughts somewhat absent.
On her desk lay an ancient tome borrowed from the library, its yellowed pages glowing faintly under the magic lamp, but she couldn’t focus on a single word.
Even a princess of the Empire, renowned for her diligence and thirst for knowledge like her, had moments when her mind would drift and she simply did not want to study.
Kefi, her newly recruited maid, had already finished meticulously cleaning her room by dusk and left quietly after saying goodbye.
At this moment, only Ellaria remained, and the dormitory was so quiet she could clearly hear her own gentle breathing, even the hollow echoes resounding inside her heart.
Ellaria felt an inexplicable sense of irritation and emptiness.
Perhaps, this was loneliness.
Though at the Academy, thanks to Teacher Sefina, her fellow assistant teachers, Mia and Kefi, had started to interact with her more, sometimes exchanging a few words, it was far from a deep or close friendship.
At this late, silent hour, with no one else around, the vast dormitory area seemed like a deserted island, with her the only one left behind.
When a person is lonely, the dam of reason seems to grow fragile, and one can’t help but do things one wouldn’t normally understand, even things that bring deep shame.
Ellaria’s gaze grew distant. She didn’t know what compelled her—drawn as if by some invisible force—she unconsciously turned, reaching out to open the drawer of her bedside cabinet.
Her fingertips searched among several odds and ends, finally touching the “piece of cloth” left behind by Teacher Sefina.
She had tried many times to throw it away, but for some reason, Ellaria could never bring herself to do it.
As if possessed, Ellaria clenched the “fabric” into a ball, pressing it tightly to her nose and inhaling deeply and greedily.
Mm—
Already… there was no scent left at all.
Only the faintest residual aroma of soap after many washings, the unique fragrance that belonged to Teacher Sefina had long faded with time and repeated cleansings.
A hint of disappointment and an even deeper longing quietly sprouted in Ellaria’s heart.
No trace of Teacher’s scent remains… I wish…
I wish I could have something fresh, something more intense
The moment this filthy thought burst into her mind, Ellaria’s eyes flew open, as if she’d suddenly realized what she was thinking…
Like she’d been shocked, Ellaria quickly threw the thing away, as though it were not soft cotton but a red-hot branding iron.
Ellaria! What on earth are you doing?!
She screamed at herself in her heart, her cheeks flushing bright red, the scorching heat spreading all the way to her ears and neck.
You’re a princess of the Empire! How can you…
How can you do such shameless, perverted things!
This is simply… simply desecration!
Ellaria squeezed her eyes shut, slender fingers clenching the bedsheet beneath her so hard her knuckles turned white.
Her heart was filled with self-loathing and harsh moral condemnation.
Every time—every single time she did this, she would fall into this fierce self-reproach.
However, after a storm of self-condemnation had passed, her agitated feelings would gradually subside, reason would return, only to bring an even deeper sense of helplessness.
She remembered—this wasn’t the first time.
No matter how deeply she berated herself with shame and remorse, the things Teacher Sefina had left behind were always carefully hidden in the depths of her drawer, never truly discarded.
A strange thought quietly surfaced:
So what…
Doing it once or a hundred times—either way, it’s done.
Since I can never return to that “spotless” past, perhaps…
Once again, as if under some mysterious compulsion, Ellaria reached out and retrieved the “item.”
She lay on her side on the bed, bringing it close to her nose and breathing in deeply once more.
She could no longer remember how many times she had repeated this blush-inducing ritual.
She had even—
On deeper nights, lying in her dorm bed, trembling with shame, secretly put it on her body…
She knew perfectly well it was wrong, an unspeakable secret that must never be revealed to anyone.
But for some reason, this twisted obsession with Teacher Sefina made her constantly oscillate between relentless self-blame and addictive, illusory indulgence, unable to escape.
Thump, thump—
Ellaria’s heart pounded violently in her chest, so loud it seemed it might burst her eardrums.
As time slipped by unnoticed, a shred of remaining reason finally struggled to the surface.
No! I can’t go on like this!
She had to do something to break this dangerous descent.
Maybe… she should go out for a walk?
Yes, go out for a walk! Take a stroll, breathe in the night air, let the cold night wind clear her muddled mind. Maybe then, she would return to normal. Yes, walking was the right idea!
Mm! That’s what I’ll do!
Like grasping a lifeline, Ellaria suddenly sat up from the bed.
She quickly put on the standard Academy uniform jacket, went to the door, changed into a clean pair of little white shoes, her toes lightly tapping the floor—as if fleeing that room full of her secret desires.
So, after gathering herself, Ellaria hurriedly left the Single Dormitory.
***
Tonight, the moonlight outside was beautiful.
Chill silver radiance fell like gauze upon the tranquil paths of Oselenka Magic Academy.
At night, the Academy shed its daytime bustle and vigor, becoming calm and gentle.
The tall magic towers cast long shadows in the moonlight, while carefully trimmed magical plants lining the paths swayed gently in the breeze, leaves occasionally reflecting specks of starlight.
The air was a bit cold, carrying the fresh scent of grass and earth; inhaling it deeply was truly refreshing, and Ellaria felt as though the troublesome thoughts in her mind had all been swept away by the night wind.
She wandered slowly along the path, the cool night breeze lifting her golden hair, blowing away some of her tangled emotions as well.
Gradually, her once turbulent mood calmed under the soothing embrace of the night. Looking up at the sky, Ellaria found the night had deepened, the air even cooler.
It was getting late—she should probably return.
Ellaria told herself that coming out had indeed made her feel much better.
However, just as she was about to turn and walk back along the path to her dormitory—
A faint, delicate gasp, mixed with a barely discernible whimper, suddenly and unexpectedly pierced through the tightly closed windows and thick walls of a classroom in the teaching building, reaching Ellaria’s ears.
Ellaria froze in her tracks. That sound was…?!
She quickly stepped closer and called out softly, “Who’s in there?”