Chapter 61: Dissolve: His Last Choice

While Song Hyunsoo was fastening the remaining buttons, Yoon Jooho took a shoebox out of a shopping bag.

“Try them on. See if they fit.”

Still turned around as he tucked the hem of his shirt into his pants, Song Hyunsoo glanced back over his shoulder.

“They’re my size.”

“I just want to see the whole look, so go ahead and try them on.”

Realizing it was pointless to argue, Song Hyunsoo took off his slippers and slipped into the shoes.

Watching from the sofa, Yoon Jooho pressed his eyelids with a hand holding a cigarette and spoke in a tired voice.

“Excuse me, but who wears ankle socks with a suit?”

“Is that… not allowed?”

Yoon Jooho shook his head.

“Like pairing red wine with fish?”

This time, Yoon Jooho nodded in reply, stubbed out his cigarette in the ashtray, and stood up.

“There’s more to teach you than I thought.”

Muttering as such, he left the rehearsal room.

Are ankle socks with a suit really that strange?

Perched on the edge of the sofa back, Song Hyunsoo lifted his feet one by one like he was playing hacky sack, examining them.

He always thought longer socks looked too middle-aged.

But imagining showing up at the party like this without Yoon Jooho’s coaching and getting embarrassed again like last time made him shudder.

When he heard Yoon Jooho’s footsteps returning down the hall, Hyunsoo quickly straightened his slouched back. Jooho came in holding a pair of black socks.

“Thank you. I’ll wear them and wash th—”

Just as he politely reached out with both hands to accept the socks, Yoon Jooho let out an odd chuckle.

“What?”

“You said you’d wash them.”

“……”

With a sly tilt of his head and a smile, Jooho tapped the tip of Hyunsoo’s shoe.

Realizing the implication, Hyunsoo scrunched up his whole face.

“You’re seriously disgusting, sunbae.”

Abandoning his polite demeanor, he snatched the socks out of Jooho’s hand.

Still looking amused, Jooho took off the tuxedo jacket he’d been wearing and walked over to hang it up.

As he placed the jacket on the hanger, he explained:

“At formal events, never wear short socks. Even when you sit down and cross your legs, the pants might ride up, but no bare skin should show. They need to be that long. Got it?”

Sitting down properly on the sofa to change socks, Hyunsoo nodded seriously.

Just like Jooho said, the socks were as long as kids’ knee-highs.

To get them on properly, he had to pull his pants legs quite far up.

“……”

As he pulled off the short sock on the other foot, a shadow fell over his head.

“Your second toe is longer.”

He lifted only his gaze while still bent over.

Jooho was standing with hands in his pockets, looking down at him from beneath half-lowered lids.

That weary, maybe slightly annoyed expression was one Hyunsoo had never seen in any of Jooho’s roles before.

It was fine seeing a new side of him, but he was standing way too close.

Jooho’s lower abdomen was practically right in front of his nose.

“A lot of people have that.”

Hyunsoo replied flatly and quickly grabbed the new sock, suddenly embarrassed to be showing his bare feet.

Wearing a full formal outfit while exposing just his feet felt strangely surreal.

Feet— what was the big deal? Normally, he wouldn’t even have thought about it.

It all felt like Jooho’s fault. That meaningful gaze from beneath his long lashes suggested he knew exactly what was going on.

He hurriedly put on the socks and slid his feet into the shoes.

They were the right size, but maybe because of the design or because they were brand new, they weren’t exactly comfortable— even though they were expensive.

Still, it wasn’t something he could complain about to someone who had gone out of their way to prepare them.

He stood and took a few steps back and forth, then nodded.

“They fit well.”

Then, with a look of resigned surrender, he shrugged at Jooho as if to ask, “Are you satisfied now?”

Yoon Jooho, rubbing his lower lip with one hand as he took in Hyunsoo’s outfit, stepped closer to a stool.

He picked up the tie hanging around the hanger’s neck and walked over.

“Now what?”

Hyunsoo flinched slightly. Jooho held up the tie in response.

“It’s a bow tie. Do you know how to tie one?”

“No.”

“Then stop acting like I’m some pervert and sit still.”

He popped Hyunsoo’s shirt collar and draped the tie around his neck, measuring the lengths on both sides.

“You start with one side slightly longer. Are you listening?”

“Are you teaching me?”

“Or do you want me to tie it for you every time?”

Honestly, that didn’t sound so bad.

Jooho briefly frowned, but seeing Hyunsoo calm down, he continued explaining.

“You take the longer end and loop it under like this for the first knot…”

The cologne Jooho had sprayed more generously than usual hung in the air like a curtain, making it feel as if Hyunsoo were being wrapped in it— almost as if he were in Jooho’s arms.

The physical distance wasn’t far from that, either.

“Then you fold the longer end like this, so it forms a butterfly shape facing forward.”

Overwhelmed by the closeness, Hyunsoo suddenly relaxed his shoulders and let out a soft laugh.

“If you’re going to learn, take it seriously. Why are you smirking?”

“I’m not smirking, I just smiled.”

“Then tell me— why did you smile?”

“Just remembered some st—”

“A while ago, a friend of mine’s older brother taught me how to tie my sneakers properly. In a way they’d never come undone. I guess he noticed I was always walking around with my laces untied. That was the first time I felt what it was like to have someone by your side who teaches you something properly— it felt reassuring, like I was being protected. I never thought I’d feel that again… because of you, because of Yoon Jooho. So I smiled, just thinking that maybe life really is worth living for moments like this.”

Instead of saying all that out loud, Song Hyunsoo swallowed the words at the last moment. And simply shook his head.

“No reason.”

“You’re so vague sometimes.”

When he glanced up, Jooho was focused on tying the bow at the base of his neck.

His entire field of vision was filled with Jooho— his face was too close, too overwhelming to handle.

Hyunsoo didn’t even dare to breathe comfortably, afraid his breath might brush Jooho’s chin or neck.

He turned his face toward the mirror to relieve the pressure.

“This part’s a little tricky. Now you take the opposite end from earlier, the one you pulled upward, and fold it…”

In the mirror, two well-dressed men faced each other.

The taller one was neatly adjusting the other’s tie.

Yoon Jooho in the reflection looked like someone who was taking care of him with care— like a reliable older brother, a close friend of many years, like Baekgang and Isan… and like a tender lover.

Staring at the mirror, Hyunsoo spoke, as if pulled by some invisible force.

“Sunbae.”

“What.”

“Have you… ever tried copying something down by hand?”

“You’re seriously not paying attention, are you?”

“I’m listening. You said fold the part you pulled up. I just… wondered if you’ve ever tried handwriting things.”

Yoon Jooho’s reflection furrowed his brow, like he might strangle him with the tie.

“I’ve been copying one page a night lately, before bed.”

“Is it working?”

“I don’t know yet. Have you tried it?”

“…Yeah, I have.”

Yoon Jooho hesitated for a moment, as if deciding whether or not to be honest.

Then, while pressing one end of the tie over the other knot, he replied plainly.

He’d once expected that he’d just stash it away without ever opening it. But he did try.

Hyunsoo shifted his gaze from the Jooho in the mirror to the real one in front of him.

And this time, he looked straight up at him.

“Sunbae.”

“Now what.”

“Happy birthday.”

“……”

Jooho, who had been staring around the nape of Hyunsoo’s neck, raised only his eyes to meet Hyunsoo’s gaze.

Then he let out a soft laugh and gave the tie a final twist.

“Took you long enough.”

Why was it? The closeness between them made it hard to breathe, made him anxious, and yet, he wanted the moment to last just a bit longer.

That aching, bittersweet feeling, like yearning for a long-lost happy memory.

With a dull, tender ache in his chest, Hyunsoo simply stared up at Jooho’s face.

“Pull this end through the back of the knot and tighten.”

Carefully adjusting the shape until the bow was balanced on both sides, Jooho finally let go of the tie and stepped back.

“Done.”

Wearing a bow tie for the first time in his life, Hyunsoo looked like a butterfly freshly emerged from its cocoon.

Head to toe, this look had been crafted by Yoon Jooho.

Gazing at himself in the mirror for a moment, Hyunsoo walked over to where his bag was and pulled out a shopping bag.

“This is your birthday gift. I figured it’d get chaotic later, so I’m giving it to you now.”

Jooho paused when he saw the luxury brand logo printed on the shopping bag.

Then, glancing sideways at Hyunsoo, he said:

“Feels like I’m robbing a flea.”

“I got a sweet side gig. It’s no big deal. The employer pays well. Pays money, gives clothes… they just throw stuff at me, honestly.”

As Hyunsoo spoke playfully, Jooho chuckled and pulled the box out of the bag.

As he undid the ribbon and opened the lid, Hyunsoo spoke quickly, almost nervously.

“Wait— but what if you already have it? I mean, I really splurged on this, so please don’t say anything too mean even if—”

Jooho opened the box and saw the hat inside.

“I don’t have it.”

“What?”

“I don’t have this one.”

“Really? That’s a relief.”

Phew. As Hyunsoo exhaled in clear relief, Jooho studied his smiling face for a moment— then pulled the hat out of the box.

Thunk. 

He pressed it down over Hyunsoo’s head, low enough to cover his eyes.

Hyunsoo immediately took it off and put it back in the box, then ran over to the mirror.

“Why’d you do that? My hair’s ruined now!”

“It didn’t ruin anything.”

“Maybe you get your hair done every day, but for me, I don’t know when I’ll get another chance like this!”

Fussing with his slightly flattened hair, Hyunsoo suddenly remembered something important.

“Oh! I need to take a picture.”

He dug his phone out of the jacket pocket hanging on the rack, then returned to the mirror and opened the camera app, angling for a good shot.

In the screen, Jooho was reflected standing off to the side, hands in his pants pockets, watching.

“Sunbae, maybe we could take one toge—”

“Are you dreaming? Still asleep?”

Right… That was a ridiculous suggestion, wasn’t it? I knew it, but I had to at least try once.

There’s probably no one else in the entire world who would turn down a photo request like that the way Yoon Jooho just did.

He pulled his hand from his pocket and checked his watch.

Then, hooking his finger through the handle of the shopping bag Hyunsoo gave him, he turned toward the door, swinging it slightly.

“Wrap things up in five. We’re leaving.”

“Already? There’s still plenty of time!”

Hyunsoo shouted after Jooho’s back as he left the room.

Just before fully stepping out the door, Jooho paused, placing his hand on the frame, and looked back.

“Rehearsal. The bartender should check out the bar in advance, don’t you think?”