Even though the story had ended, no one could bring themselves to speak.
Among them, two people especially couldn’t accept what they had heard.
Kang Hong-yeon and Saria remained in shock.
They couldn’t believe that the person in the story and the Kang Si-woo they knew were the same person.
“…Is that… really true?”
“I don’t know what exactly you’re asking about, but there’s not even 1mg of a lie in what I said. If you’re that curious, ask him yourself. The Si-woo of today would probably talk about those days like they were no big deal.”
At Jung Se-ah’s words, Saria couldn’t hold back and burst out.
“That’s impossible! If what you said is true, then there’s no way he could speak so calmly about it…!!”
Say it like it’s no big deal?
Don’t be ridiculous! Saria practically screamed, straining her voice.
But Jung Se-ah gave a bitter smile, as if she understood.
“It’s not like I haven’t thought the same thing.”
“What…?”
“You think Si-woo’s acting, right? If not that, then he’s pushing himself too hard or taking medication without us knowing.”
Jung Se-ah had thought that many times.
She was shocked when she heard he had quit his meds.
And when she saw him casually talking with other girls, she had more moments of worry than she could count.
When he held her hand like it was nothing, she even feared it might be a sign he was planning something drastic.
“But it really isn’t that.”
“How is that even possible?”
“Well, who knows. Unless you ask him directly, I don’t think anyone can say for sure.”
Jung Se-ah’s gaze moved past Saria, toward something beyond.
Only then did everyone realize how much time had passed.
Lost in the story, they hadn’t noticed the hours slipping by.
They all turned their heads with dazed expressions.
And where Jung Se-ah was looking stood a man, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, wearing nothing but a shower gown and smiling.
“Finished with your story?”
“There’s still a lot more… but maybe it’s better not to say.”
“Right. I think so too. The fewer people who know this story, the better.”
Stories this dark and unpleasant were best kept from others.
“More than anything, I hate situations like this. When people hear about my past and start looking at me differently.”
“Oh dear, then maybe I really shouldn’t have said anything?”
“Well, that’s not exactly it.”
It wasn’t the kind of story that needed to be revealed, but it also wasn’t something that had to be hidden forever.
Above all, this wound in his heart wasn’t truly healed.
If anything, it was more of a patch than a treatment, and not even a proper patch, but a crude fix, like cutting out the broken part altogether.
Which meant it could always come back.
“And calling you here this time… It connects with what Master once told me, too.”
“That’s the first I’ve heard of it.”
“Well, of course. This story—no one here knows it. Actually, no one at all knows it.”
As he said that, Si-woo took a seat.
And just as Jung Se-ah predicted, he started speaking like it was no big deal.
“I think… a few of my emotions might’ve died.”
“…What?”
A story that should never be told with such an expression.
Yet he said it with calm detachment.
*****
When was the last time I loved someone?
For most people, it’s during middle or high school.
Even those who are late bloomers probably fall in love at least once in college.
Whether that love blossoms or withers before it blooms, that’s up to the person.
But everyone at some point plants that seed in the soil of their heart.
Even if it’s just a one-sided crush, people call it love and wait patiently for the flower to bloom.
“Hmm… I’m not really sure when.”
But Si-woo had never experienced that.
During middle and high school, he didn’t have the space to hold something like love.
Just surviving each day was painful.
There was no room to think about loving someone.
So, never knowing love, Si-woo chose to stand alone.
And soon after, he was scouted by Yu Ga-eun.
It was at the host bar that he experienced love for the first time.
“Seo-ha—no, Ga-eun noona was my first love.”
There wasn’t a dramatic moment like in a movie.
One day, he just wanted to see her face more, even for a moment.
Even when he found other women repulsive, Yu Ga-eun was the one exception—he loved her that much.
That’s why he didn’t quit the host job.
At the very least, until he reached his goal, he wanted to stay by her side.
Even when he felt like dying, he kept doing the work.
“Unlike everyone else, I thought Noona was truly good.”
“…”
Yu Ga-eun couldn’t say anything in response.
Was it because she hadn’t expected it?
Or was there a deeper reason she couldn’t accept his feelings?
No, It wasn’t any of that.
“But really, one day I just looked at you, and… felt nothing.”
Si-woo’s expression as he spoke about his first love felt strangely out of place.
A smile, no different from usual.
It wasn’t forced or strange—there was emotion in it.
“There was no real reason to lose those feelings. Even when I looked at you, just like that day when I thought about killing that customer, I felt… nothing.”
“That kind of thing… can happen, right?”
She tried desperately to deny it.
Tried to convince herself that what she understood in her head was actually a lie.
“Yes, like you said, that’s possible. Love is such a fickle thing. It can break without a reason, or twist in another direction.”
At the time, Si-woo had tried to think like Yu Ga-eun too.
His hatred and disgust toward women had overtaken the feeling of love.
He convinced himself that was all it was, and though he felt a little empty about how his first love ended, he accepted it and moved on.
“But the real problem started somewhere else.”
Even though just a few days ago he hadn’t wanted to meet with clients, he was serving them again, and it didn’t hurt.
He ran into someone unexpectedly and had taken some light meds, but instead of wanting to run away, all he thought was, ‘Ah, another annoying woman came to find me.’
And that was it.
“It’s not just love. Even emotions like disgust or fear… I don’t really feel them anymore.”
“…You should’ve said something sooner!!!”
Yu Ga-eun shouted, unable to hold back any longer.
“I was going to. But I was quitting in a few months anyway, right?”
“Well, yeah, but still…!!!”
“So I just didn’t say anything. I figured I’d get psychiatric treatment later anyway. And honestly, being like this was way better for me.”
The urges for self-harm or suicide disappeared completely.
Even without medication, he could now talk to women.
Thanks to that, not just Jung Se-ah, but even Baek Eun-seol and Kitsunezawa, who had come as clients, were able to train him.
With no emotional outbursts, talking to clients became much easier.
For a while, he even thought he could live like this forever without a problem.
“Well, then I went to a psychiatrist and, just as expected, got diagnosed with affective blunting.”
“…Did it get better?”
“I don’t really know. I got a prescription, but it didn’t do much. So I can’t tell if my emotions are coming back, or if I still have the condition and nothing’s changed.”
His date with Saria.
His meeting with Im So-yeon.
Glacia and Their Farewell.
The reunion of three former VIPs.
Through all those events, Si-woo came to realize, his emotions weren’t completely gone.
Especially his meeting and farewell with Glacia.
The story they shared when they met again in the gate…
He had felt so many emotions then.
“So I met up with you and, as a kind of test, asked you on a date.”
If his emotions had truly returned, he figured he’d feel at least a little flutter from reuniting with his first love.
Even if not full-blown excitement, he thought there’d be at least a slight tremble in his heart, since it was a date with the woman he once loved.
“…So, how was it?”
Yu Ga-eun asked with a trembling voice.
During that date.
Were you happy?
Any answer would’ve been enough.
Even if he said it was just “so-so,” she would’ve welcomed it.
Whether it was hatred, love, anger, or disappointment, she didn’t care.
She just hoped, that he felt something.
But.
“I really didn’t feel a thing!”
That hope shattered, with a bright smile.