Chapter 44: Teasing

“So the reason your face darkened just now was because you thought of the past?”

Lu Dongnuan didn’t press him further on “why he was angry.” 

She simply knelt down, her fingertips lightly brushing against the edge of an unfinished cardboard box near Lin Mo’s knees, her tone as soft and warm as if she were gathering a bundle of scattered cotton.

Lin Mo’s fingertips paused, and the sound of the utility knife slicing through the tape became a bit more strained. 

“Yeah. There was a junior I thought highly of. His mother entrusted him to me before she died, but I broke my promise.” 

The cigarette burned between his fingers, ash falling onto the cardboard box.

Lu Dongnuan didn’t respond to the “broken promise.” 

Instead, she stared at the cigarette butt; the filter had been squeezed out of shape by Lin Mo, leaving finger marks embedded in the paper.

“You can be sentimental too, I see.” She lowered her voice even further, as if talking to herself, “When I used to watch my dad handle old cases, he would always sneak a smoke. He said when the cigarette is burning, the things that make your heart feel stifled can float away with the smoke rings for a while. It makes them feel less heavy.”

Lin Mo took a puff of the cigarette, the tobacco crackling as it burned.

Lu Dongnuan reached out to help him gather the bubble wrap scattered on the floor and asked, “You didn’t use to smoke, right? Was it after that time that the things in your heart couldn’t float away anymore?”

“No.”

Lin Mo pressed the cigarette butt hard against the edge of the foam, scorching a charred black mark into it.

“Earlier.”

Lu Dongnuan didn’t speak. 

She just took a mint out of her pocket, peeled off the wrapper, and handed it over. 

Her fingertips brushed the candy wrapper, and her voice was very soft, “Sometimes the things we didn’t do are more agonizing than the things we did wrong.”

Lin Mo stared at the mint for a moment, his thumb brushing over the scorch mark he had just left with the cigarette.

After a long while, he reached out to take it, the wrapper crinkling between his fingers.

“Who killed him?” Lu Dongnuan asked gently, tilting her head.

“You.”

Lu Dongnuan’s eyes widened slightly, and she imperceptibly moved a little to the side.

“How regrettable that it just happened to be me.” She lowered her head.

“I know that feeling. The feeling of seeing a junior you favored die right before your eyes when you were at your most powerless—it’s very hard to bear.”

She glanced at Lin Mo.

This was the first time Lu Dongnuan was able to probe into Lin Mo’s past. 

For her, this was an opportunity to understand him.

“Can you tell me about it?”

Lin Mo glanced at her and replied, “We still have things to deliver.”

“It’s fine. I can let the Zombies do it. we can just send the instructions in the group chat.”

Lin Mo let out a small laugh, “Stop trying to scout me out. I know you very well.”

“Then do you know yourself?” Lu Dongnuan continued, “Actually, the ultimate goal of studying psychology is learning to accept.”

Then, she tapped Lin Mo’s nose with her finger.

“Look, I’m very good at accepting. Accepting myself, accepting the past. Getting to know oneself isn’t meant to sentence the past, but to unbind the future.” She paused for a moment. 

“Besides, the present isn’t the past yet. Since you were reborn, can’t you change the future?”

Lin Mo became lost in thought. 

Then, he pulled out a handgun and looked at Lu Dongnuan aggressively.

“Makes sense!”

Lu Dongnuan didn’t back away. 

Instead, she leaned forward slightly, her fingertips lightly touching the wrist of his hand holding the gun.

Lin Mo looked at the woman before him. 

This person, who was usually so timid and afraid of death, now seemed fearless, proactively pressing her forehead against the muzzle of the gun.

Her voice remained very gentle as her gaze fell upon the barrel.

“Your grip on a gun is much steadier than on a cigarette. You used to use it to protect people, didn’t you?”

Lin Mo’s finger jerked violently. 

His strength instantly drained from his hand, and the gun hit the cardboard box with a “clang.” 

The moment it bounced, he even subconsciously reached out to catch it, just as he had desperately tried to grab the sliding wrist of that young boy in the mudslide all those years ago.

His breathing suddenly became heavy. 

His fingertips were as cold as if they had been soaked in ice water. 

He stared at the faint red mark on Lu Dongnuan’s forehead where the muzzle had brushed against her. 

His Adam’s apple bobbed several times before he could force a sound out.

“Gutsy, aren’t you?”

Lu Dongnuan didn’t move. 

She just looked up slightly, her gaze falling on his still-stiff hand. 

That hand remained in a half-clenched position, his knuckles white, but he showed no intention of touching the gun again.

“I’m not crazy.” Her voice was very light, like a feather landing on his heart, “I just know that someone who can hold a gun this steadily would never point the muzzle at someone they want to protect. Just like how you protected him back then.”

Of course, one shouldn’t think that Lu Dongnuan was actually feeling sentimental as well. 

She was freaking out internally, and even the Zombies standing nearby were breaking into a sweat for her but she had no choice; she had to keep up the bluff.

Lin Mo saw right through Lu Dongnuan, so he shoved the gun back into his pocket and spoke in an exaggerated tone.

“Thank you, Dr. Lu. Your psychological therapy session was very effective. I’ll seek you out again next time.”

Lu Dongnuan’s face stiffened for half a second. 

The breath she had been holding while facing the gun nearly failed to catch.

How could she have forgotten? 

This guy might look cold, but he was very meticulous. 

Her little display of feigned composure had likely been seen through long ago.

She quickly looked away and reached down to pick up a cardboard box, her voice sounding a bit airy, “Just making casual conversation…” 

Just as she finished, she felt a light pat on the back of her neck. 

She turned around to see Lin Mo shaking his pocket; the mint wrapper rustled inside, and a hint of an uncontrollable smile was hidden in his eyes.

“Sure, casual conversation.” He didn’t expose her further. 

He bent down to pick up another box and pointed toward the building ahead, his tone much softer than before.

Lu Dongnuan’s ears instantly turned hot. 

She shot him a secret glare but didn’t retort, simply carrying the box and walking quickly ahead.

Seeing the atmosphere relax, the Zombies behind them finally dared to shuffle closer, their claws carefully avoiding the spot where the gun had hit the floor.

Lin Mo followed behind. 

Looking at her slightly flustered silhouette, he reached into his pocket and touched the unfinished mint. 

As the cool freshness of the mint spread, he suddenly remembered how A Zhe used to always say, “Bro, stop always scowling. It’s not that hard to smile.” 

His Adam’s apple moved slightly, and he called out softly, “Dr. Lu.”

Lu Dongnuan turned back and asked, “What now?”

“Next time we have a ‘casual conversation,'” Lin Mo shook his pocket, the sound of the mint wrapper very light, “bring more mints. The smell of smoke is too sharp; they can’t quite mask it.”

Lu Dongnuan was stunned for a moment. 

Then, the corners of her mouth couldn’t help but curl upward. 

Most of her panic from earlier dissipated, and the hand holding the box steadied. 

“Got it. Next time I’ll bring you some 💩-flavored ones. How’s that?”

Lin Mo’s mouth twitched, he didn’t say anything and turned around to continue delivering supplies.