Under Julius’s sharp gaze, Helos could only shuffle her feet reluctantly.
She inched her way up the stairs, still muttering something under her breath. Probably complaining about how a certain knight was too controlling, or still lamenting that Dawn Dew had been gulped down by Sylvia while she herself learned nothing.
“Go to sleep.”
Julius’s voice drifted up from downstairs. Though his tone was calm, it carried an unarguable parental authority.
“I know! So annoying!”
Helos turned back to glare at the black-haired young man standing in the middle of the hall like a guardian deity, then huffed and stomped up the old wooden stairs, climbing step by step to the second floor.
The second-floor corridor of Rose Pavilion felt especially deep in the night.
Although Gavi and the maids had cleaned as thoroughly as possible, the ancient aura accumulated over centuries still lingered.
The candlelight from the wall sconces cast a dim glow, stretching her shadow long and thin.
Wind from outside rattled the rose vines clinging to the outer walls, making a sound like fingernails scraping against glass.
If this had been a few hours ago, Helos might have been frightened by the eerie atmosphere.
But now, she didn’t think it was a big deal.
After all, downstairs stood a saint knight who could make the Great Slayer of Mages beg for mercy, she had a ridiculously strong maid following her, and even her saintess sister was watching her back.
The “monsters” gathered in this building were far scarier than any ethereal ghosts.
Helos pushed open the door to her room.
It was a bedroom on the south side of the second floor, with a wide view and the best lighting.
Although the furniture looked a bit old, the materials were exquisite, and the four-poster bed was covered with goose-down bedding that Eleanor had specifically sent over, soft as clouds.
She kicked off her shoes, too lazy even to change out of the home dress she’d worn all day, and flopped straight onto the soft mattress.
As for ladylike etiquette, she’d already thrown it out the window.
“Whoosh—”
The moment her body sank into the bedding, the fatigue she’d been forcibly suppressing surged over her like a tide.
She rolled over, cocooning herself like a spring roll, leaving only half her face exposed, and stared at the moon half-covered by clouds outside the window.
So quiet.
Everything around was too quiet.
Quiet enough that she could clearly hear her own slightly rapid heartbeat.
Thump, thump…
Helos irritably grabbed her hair, trying to calm her tangled mind.
Sleep.
Go to sleep quickly.
Tomorrow she had to get up early for lessons and find a way to root out the Chaos Believers hiding in the shadows.
As for alchemy… well, under Julius’s supervision, she could probably continue, right?
But she had too many things to do—no time to waste on such matters.
Yet every time she closed her eyes, that black-haired young man’s face would uncontrollably appear in her mind.
Julius.
That bastard who disappeared for three years and then suddenly descended like a god before her.
‘Really… what’s so great about him?’
Helos buried her face in the pillow, letting out a muffled complaint.
She tried to list Julius’s flaws in her mind to calm her inexplicable agitation.
He was a blockhead, completely oblivious to romance.
He was rigid, always trying to restrain her with that knight’s code.
He was also a meddler—back in childhood, he loved following her around cleaning up her messes, and now grown up, he was even worse, even controlling what time she went to bed.
And most importantly, he was a liar who broke his promises!
He said he’d be back soon, but then he was gone for three years!
Three years!
Did he know how she’d gotten through that time?
The angrier Helos got, the more she couldn’t help lifting her foot and kicking the blanket hard.
But just as she was fuming and about to add more grievances to Julius’s account, another image suddenly intruded into her mind.
It was from a few nights ago.
In that dark, terrifying forest, when that icy will that made even her soul tremble was about to devour her.
That man, holding the Holy Sword, had stepped out of the shadows one step at a time.
Golden rays torn through the darkness.
The light around him was so warm, so dazzling, like the rising sun, instantly dispelling all the fear and cold in her heart.
He hadn’t abandoned her for creating the monster.
He hadn’t backed away because she ordered him killed.
He simply dropped his sword, rushed forward recklessly, and tightly embraced her—the her corrupted by Chaos—in his arms.
“I’m back, Helos.”
That choked whisper, trembling, still echoed clearly in her ears.
Helos stopped struggling.
She felt her cheeks heating up at an abnormal rate, the warmth spreading from her neck all the way to her ears.
‘Damn it…’
She covered her face in despair.
Why couldn’t she forget it?
Why did that image seem to have taken root in her mind, refusing to leave no matter how hard she tried?
Helos felt as if two completely different souls lived inside her, locked in a fierce battle.
One was the soul from her past life, the one that considered itself a manly man.
It was roaring wildly inside her head.
‘’Calm down, Helos! You’re a decent person! Even if your current body is female, your soul is pure male!’
‘That guy is just your brother! Your buddy! That was a comrade’s embrace! A bond of life and death! Why are you blushing?’
‘Getting saved by a brother is normal, right? You would have saved him too! What’s there to be moved about? This isn’t scientific!’
‘Snap out of it! Don’t let this body’s instincts lead you astray! Women only slow down your sword-drawing speed! Alchemy is truth! Explosion is art!’’
This rough voice shouted in her mind, trying to suppress that strange throbbing with logic and so-called “manly pride.”
But then.
Another voice—the one belonging to this body, to this budding maiden—quietly rebutted.
That voice was weak, shy, yet strangely firm.
‘But… his embrace really was warm.’
‘His hands were big and strong. When he held mine, I really felt safe.’
‘And the way he looked at me… was really gentle.’
‘And… he is pretty handsome.’
The maiden’s voice whispered in the depths of her heart, with a hint of shyness.
‘He came back from so far away just for me. He fought those terrifying monsters for me. He even let himself be misunderstood and hurt by me for my sake.’
‘In this world, who else would treat me like that?’
‘Admit it, Helos. You just like being protected by him. You like seeing him worried about you. You even kind of like—’
“Aaaaaah! Shut up! Shut up!”
Helos sat up abruptly, rubbing her hair frantically with both hands, turning her originally smooth silver hair into a bird’s nest.
She shouted at the empty room, as if raising her voice could drown out the thunderous beating of her heart.
‘I don’t like him! I don’t!’
‘I don’t like him! I don’t!’
She lay back down, forcing an excuse.
‘I’m just… grateful! Yes! Grateful!’
‘That night was the bridge effect! It’s in the books! When people are in danger, they develop a false sense of dependence on their rescuer! It’s just hormones! A dopamine trick!’
‘It’ll pass! Once this wave is over, I’ll be back to normal!’
Helos kept muttering internally as she pulled the blanket over her head, trying to isolate herself from this world full of pink bubbles.
But no matter how she hypnotized herself, no matter how she explained it with rigid theories.
The moment her thoughts relaxed even a little.
Julius’s helpless smile.
His warm embrace.
And that kiss on her forehead, light as a feather.
Immediately slipped into her mind, softly scratching at the tip of her heart.
That feeling…
Wasn’t unpleasant.
It was even… a little sweet.
‘I really can’t win with him…’
Helos let out a long sigh under the blanket.
She gave up resisting.
Forget it.
Let herself think about it.
She stopped struggling with the conflict between “male soul” and “maiden heart.”
She simply let his figure swirl in her mind, let that warmth flow through her limbs and bones.
After all, no one knew.
After all… he was right downstairs.
In this very building.
If she called out, he would appear before her instantly.
That realization brought Helos an unprecedented sense of security.
The wind outside the window seemed to soften too.
Finally, sleep overcame the tangled thoughts.
Helos’s breathing gradually became steady and long.
In the last moment before drifting into dreams, the corners of her mouth unconsciously turned up, forming a curve she herself didn’t notice.
In her dream, there was no cold laboratory, no raving Chaos Believers.
Only a sunlit meadow.
And a black-haired young man in paladin armor, standing not far away, smiling and reaching out his hand to her.
“Idiot.”
She murmured sleepily.
Then, the girl rolled over and sank completely into sweet slumber.