“Hmph, definitely not.”
It’s just that…
Looking at her right now, even though she had just witnessed a frenzied, bloodthirsty slaughter up close, there wasn’t the slightest trace of exhaustion or fear on her face.
Only a deeper numbness, completely out of place for her age—an empty, hollow gaze that occasionally reminded He Deng Hong of his own state after dropping out of high school, rushing between countless part-time jobs, unable to see any future ahead.
A state… on the verge of being crushed by something, or随时可能放弃挣扎的边缘，虽然现在也还是这样。
So, even though he felt it was a bit meddlesome, even a little awkward—after all, showing concern for a ten-year-old girl while wearing He Jiu Lu’s appearance was strange no matter how you looked at it—he still asked.
“Tell me about it. Though we can’t exactly call ourselves close friends who’ve spent day and night together, at the very least we’re comrades-in-arms who’ve fought side by side from time to time and shared hardships.” He Jiu Lu began gently coaxing her.
“Even if I can’t help you, at least you can vent the emotions you’ve been bottling up for so long. I’m confident I can be a good listener.”
“No matter what it is, keeping everything pent up inside will make anyone sick. You’re still young—don’t shoulder everything alone without ever talking to anyone. You don’t have to make yourself this exhausted.”
“As your comrade and senior, you can trust me completely. Don’t feel embarrassed or worry about troubling others. Maybe you can also think about it—who else besides me might be a better person for you to confide in?”
The sound of the airflow during flight seemed to fade. Sui Luo Wen turned her head, those blue eyes looking toward He Jiu Lu.
The complete emptiness inside them was gone, replaced by a surge of extremely complex emotions—struggle, hesitation, and a faint tremor as if something hidden in her heart had been touched.
She was silent for a full ten or more seconds. Just when He Jiu Lu thought she wouldn’t respond and was about to laugh it off and change the subject, Sui Luo Wen slowly raised the hand that wasn’t holding “Critique.”
Perhaps the half-month of fighting side by side had gradually built some bond between them, or perhaps the desire to confide that she had been suppressing had finally overflowed at this moment. In any case, Sui Luo Wen began to express herself.
Her fingers moved—not with the sharp, swift precision of combat, but with a subtle stiffness and heaviness that was hard to notice—tracing out standard sign language in the air.
“They… say I’m a trouble that shouldn’t exist.”
He Jiu Lu watched those gestures, and at the same time felt He Deng Hong’s real body’s heart sink heavily.
Although He Deng Hong hadn’t understood sign language before, because of Sui Luo Wen’s special circumstances, he had taught himself.
Controlling He Jiu Lu’s face, he worked hard to maintain a calm and focused expression, nodded, and indicated that he was watching.
Once she had started, the rest seemed to flow more smoothly.
Sui Luo Wen’s fingers danced in the air, pouring out—through silent signs—the long-buried, ice-cold,刺-bearing words and experiences.
Her abandoned background, the label of “orphan,” the mockery of being “mute” and “expressionless,” the exclusion for not fitting in, the intensified bullying after telling the teacher, the powerlessness of feeling that everything she did was wrong no matter what…
And finally, that chilling thought that “if I just disappeared, all the trouble would be solved”…
She didn’t add much emotional embellishment—just a straightforward, almost mechanical recounting.
Yet precisely because of that flatness, it carried an even deeper, bone-chilling coldness and despair.
He Deng Hong watched quietly, reading every sign through his avatar’s eyes.
In his real body’s pocket, his fist clenched silently. His chest felt stuffed with soaking-wet cotton—heavy and suffocating.
He could completely imagine what kind of situation that was. His own current life—having dropped out of high school, struggling day to day—hadn’t lacked for disdainful looks and contempt, but at least…
At least sometimes he could curse back, or retreat to the apartment he rented.
But what Sui Luo Wen faced was omnipresent malice directed at her unchosen origins and disabilities. She couldn’t even use her voice to fight back.
When Sui Luo Wen signed the part about the thought “it would be better if I disappeared,” He Jiu Lu finally couldn’t hold back. He reached out and gently patted her shoulder.
The white-streaked girl’s body stiffened for a moment, but she didn’t pull away.
Suddenly, in the depths of He Deng Hong’s consciousness, a cold voice whispered, connecting a detail he hadn’t paid attention to earlier—
“What about that old Taoist priest? Should we seal him up too? Should we break his limbs first?”
Back then, the sentence Sui Luo Wen had written on the floor inside the Gong Ji Shi branch with “Critique”—He Deng Hong had only thought it was childish belligerence or excessive caution.
And at the time he was in a hurry to get back to the construction site for work, so he hadn’t thought much of it.
But now, combined with everything she had just confided—the bullying that had nearly crushed her—
He Deng Hong suddenly realized that it might not have been purely for combat reasons.
It was perhaps… an extremely veiled outlet, strictly confined within the boundaries allowed by “rules.”
Toward “anomalies” from the world of consciousness, she could propose extreme measures without any psychological burden—because they were “trouble,” “enemies,” existences outside the rules that required no sympathy.
This cold ruthlessness toward “non-human” enemies formed a subtle, heart-shaking contrast with her firm底线 of never using private punishment against “humans.”
Her heart wasn’t without dark corners; it was just that the vines born from pain and anger had been tightly, tightly bound by her extraordinarily strong willpower inside a cage aimed only at “anomalies.”
Normally never revealed, but when facing “abnormalities” not belonging to this world, a sliver of icy chill would unintentionally leak through the bars of that cage.
This child’s inner world… was far more complex and repressed than what she showed on the surface.
He Deng Hong quietly drew in a cold breath.
But on that day, Sui Luo Wen had many opportunities to do something to Zhen Yuanzi—for example, directly kneading him into a “ball of flesh and blood paper” using her special trait.
Yet in reality, she hadn’t done anything cruel to Zhen Yuanzi. She had even asked Chi Wu Tu first. It showed that toward human-like “abnormalities,” Sui Luo Wen still held certain底线 and principles.
So how should he help this helpless child? Report to the police? Would the police even care?
Or would they say there’s no evidence, so not even verbal warning is possible?
Or even if the police gave a verbal warning, would those classmates just go back to their old ways after a while?
Clearly, reporting it wouldn’t accomplish anything.
But he also couldn’t suggest that Sui Luo Wen use violence to get justice for herself—that would only escalate the problem, not solve it.
That would be the same as walking down his own old path, becoming someone “abandoned by all.”