In the mirror, the girl’s face was still pale as paper.
My abdomen was flat again, but not as slender as last year.
I undid my hospital gown, gazing at the stretch marks on my belly—still ugly and glaring.
I could only hypnotize myself not to look, and felt a bit better.
I took out a sanitary pad from my bracelet, slapped it on, used the bathroom, then lay back down.
Last month, Su Liumeng asked why I always carried pads with me.
I never answered directly.
This thing.
I’d always prepared it for myself.
Postpartum bleeding lasts a long time. Maybe Su Liumeng would be uncomfortable changing them for me. My pants were already slightly stained, so I changed into a fresh hospital gown.
Knock, knock, knock—
It was the sound of knocking.
Chunqiao brought something in and, before leaving, said, “The young miss isn’t available right now, so this maid will look after you for the time being. If you need anything, just call for me and I’ll be waiting outside the ward.”
I paused, holding the boxed package. “Just go to sleep, you don’t need to watch over me. You stood in the delivery room nearly all day. I’ll be asleep soon after I finish, shouldn’t need anything.”
Chunqiao replied respectfully, “As you command, miss.”
Though she said so, she curled up on a corridor bench, leaning against the armrest for a short rest where Si Xinyan couldn’t see.
After opening the package and stimulating for a while, I felt it was almost ready, closed my eyes, and soon fell asleep with my head tilted.
I used to love sleeping on my side; now, finally able to do so again, it felt strange, since I’d gotten used to lying flat. I tossed and turned before settling on my back, staring at the ceiling.
I hadn’t slept long before the baby’s cries woke me.
Si Zhiruo was calling, “Yiya, yiya.”
As a new mother, I was sensitive to baby sounds. At the slightest noise, I would wake up—never able to sleep long.
Glancing at the clock, another three hours had passed.
I brought my daughter onto the bed, and the little one immediately quieted, her soft baby voice losing its sharp edge, sounding more like she was being coy.
“What a clingy little thing.” I laughed wryly, poking her chubby face again. “Hungry? If you’re hungry, just say so.”
“Yiya~~” Of course, she couldn’t talk.
By now, I figured my milk had probably come in. As a cultivator, my body was a bit stronger than most.
I undid three buttons of my shirt and pulled down my inner garment.
She was truly hungry now. Without grabbing my collar, she dove right in.
I didn’t intend to use formula.
I have the Pure Yin Body.
The baby’s foundation was that of a fierce spirit. Fierce spirits use yin energy to strengthen their resentment—this was a match made in heaven.
The faint energy in the milk would be the best supplement for her growth.
First milk was crucial, filled with trace elements that could greatly boost a baby’s immunity.
Feeling the damp sensation, I finally relaxed.
If even I ended up starving my baby to tears, that would make no sense at all.
The toothless little one’s bite didn’t hurt.
As a first-time mom, I instinctively patted her back, gradually getting the hang of it.
After about ten minutes, she finished, then babbled again.
I noticed her tone changed every time, as if she had things she wanted to express.
Just like most babies cry when hungry or uncomfortable, she seemed to have her own way of communicating.
“Are you saying you’re full?”
“Yiya—”
Already full?
The extra stimulation was working; now I even felt a bit of physical swelling.
No big deal. Babies needed feeding every few hours anyway.
After more effort, I finally coaxed my daughter back to sleep.
Just gone through labor and now caring for my daughter—I was at the very limit of my endurance. My throat was still hoarse, and I was only able to keep speaking to my daughter through sheer maternal love.
If Su Liumeng didn’t come back soon, I had no idea what I’d do.
I couldn’t possibly wake up every two hours to feed the baby by myself.
If it was just me, this was the only way.
I sighed inwardly. Raising a child was truly no easy thing.
I took out the diapers I’d prepared and changed the baby myself.
She didn’t wake, as if she sensed the presence of her mother nearby and felt most secure.
I picked up my phone and sent Su Liumeng a message: “Don’t forget to bring a few more bottles.”
We still had a few days of observation in the hospital before going home—couldn’t have the baby going hungry.
Feeling I’d thought of everything, I closed my eyes again, intending to nap for a bit.
But not long after, the little one’s noises woke me again.
She didn’t cry, but she had her needs, too.
Hearing her urgent sounds, I got up in a panic, scooping her into my arms. “What is it? Are you uncomfortable?”
Then it hit me. “Do you need to go to the bathroom?”
“Yiya, yiya.”
Dizzy with exhaustion, I nearly stumbled as I walked a few steps.
“Yiya—” Her tone suddenly grew sad, and her little hand gripped my collar.
Instinctively, I looked down and saw tears welling in her eyes.
Seeing that, for some reason, I wanted to cry too.
“Mama’s fine, just tired.”
“Zhizhi, don’t cry, don’t cry. Let’s go to the bathroom now.”
“Mama will always be here for you.”
The perceptive little one tightened her hold on my collar.
Most newborns would just pee in their diapers while asleep.
Si Zhiruo was only a day old, yet could already express her feelings.
The discovery thrilled me.
Another ten minutes to get her to sleep, and I sat on the edge of the bed, clutching my aching temples.
A labor lasting a dozen hours had left me utterly drained. Now, still in postpartum recovery, I was fragile as paper.
Barely getting six hours of sleep, woken up three times, I honestly wondered if I’d be the first to collapse—maybe even suffer lasting harm.
But, this was my daughter.
If I didn’t comfort her, who would?
I’d wanted Chunqiao to help, but was afraid the baby would cry at a stranger. In the end, it was easier to do it myself.
She was my own flesh and blood, after all. Under the powerful conviction of a mother’s love, even exhausted, I still got up patiently, again and again, to care for my baby.
Seeing Su Liumeng’s reply on my phone, I finally smiled, worried the baby would get hungry again, and, instead of going back to sleep, leaned against the headboard and nodded off holding a pillow.
Sure enough, an hour later, the little one woke again, demanding to nurse.
I opened my eyes slowly, my head still pounding, but with no trace of annoyance. The instant my palm touched her tiny hand, a soft spot deep in my heart was touched, and the fatigue in my eyes melted into pure tenderness.
“Hungry again?”
“My baby’s the best. Eat more and grow up big and strong.”
Newborns needed to eat every two or three hours—sometimes even up to eleven or twelve times a day. It was a never-ending cycle.
This time, I switched sides.
Both sides ached, and the one left unused was even more uncomfortable.
After she finished, the little one didn’t make a fuss—perhaps I’d finally hit my limit, and she fell asleep without needing me to coax her much.
Looking at her adorable face, it was as if my exhaustion had faded, and I couldn’t help but gently nudge her nose. Her soft, milky skin was so smooth, I couldn’t get enough.
“So good.” Still holding her, the corners of my mouth lifted.
She really was a very, very good baby.
At least she didn’t cry or make trouble.
I wanted to keep her in bed with me for easy care, but worried I might accidentally roll over and crush her, so I carefully set her back in the crib.
Checking Su Liumeng’s message, I replied:
[No need to rush, take it step by step.]
[I’m managing here. The baby isn’t troublesome and is very good.]
I forced myself to finish typing, then drifted off against the headboard.
Time ticked by. When Su Liumeng opened the ward door, she saw the girl slumped against the bed, so wan and fragile her heart nearly shattered with pain.
She wanted to carry the girl onto the bed, but at her touch, the girl jerked awake as if triggered by a switch, startled from her sleep.
“The baby—is she hungry again?” I blurted out reflexively.
Seeing it was Su Liumeng, I glanced at the crib to make sure the baby hadn’t been disturbed, then relaxed. “Keep your voice down, don’t wake Zhizhi.”
“Did you get the registration done? Let me see.”
Su Liumeng moved quietly, handing me a booklet. I checked the name and birthdate. “Name’s right, and the birthdate matches.”
I stowed the booklet in my storage space. Seeing this, Su Liumeng took out several bottles.
“This can’t go on—you’d better prepare more bottles. That way, when I’m sleeping, you can feed the baby too. I just started postpartum recovery, I need time to rest, or I’ll collapse.”
“You’re my partner, my most trusted and cherished person. Caring for our daughter, I can only trust you with that.”
“Even Chunqiao—I don’t trust her as much.”
Hearing these words, Su Liumeng felt even warmer inside and instantly vowed to complete her task.
I hugged the girl before me, planting a kiss on her cheek. “This period, taking care of a newborn is most important. If I neglect you a bit, I want to say sorry in advance.”
“You’re important to me, too.”
“I… don’t want you to be sad.”
Su Liumeng hugged my still frail body in return. “Silly girl, saying such foolish things. With our relationship, how could I not understand you?”
Love is, after all, mutual understanding.
I smiled lightly, and reached out for another tap.
A moment later, seeing Su Liumeng hadn’t left, I picked up a cold bottle and shook it with my left hand. “I’m getting ready. Are you planning to watch?”
Su Liumeng wanted to say yes, but seeing the girl’s reddened face, she became so shy it was beyond words.
“Feeding the baby just now, I had just finished giving birth, so I didn’t have the strength to care.”
“Now…”
“You still want to watch!!”
I tilted my head, first-time motherly, full of wifely charm but still adorable, baring my tiny tiger teeth as I made a fist at Su Liumeng—though it wasn’t threatening at all.
“Su Liumeng, do you want me to bite you?”
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