Chapter 12: I’m Not Angry

Shin Yooyeon, an ordinary housewife living in Gyeonggi-do,

had little interest in the presidential election or any of the other noisy issues capturing public attention.

She was too busy running her small noodle shop, taking care of her seven-year-old son, and managing housework to pay attention to such things.

“Aiming for consistency and continuity in policy…”

As usual, she was washing dishes while listening to her son mumbling to himself.

Children can be mysterious at times.

Her son, Shin Yoo, chirped endlessly like a baby bird except when he was asleep.

“What do kids even have so much to talk about?”

It wasn’t just her son.

When she asked other moms around her, they said the same thing.

Kids are natural chatterboxes.

“…It was Future Marriage Ginkgo Korea Party!”

Her son was currently watching YouTube and enthusiastically repeating something he heard.

Though the content seemed a bit odd, she let it slide as long as it didn’t include profanity.

Kids naturally gravitate toward strange words.

“The pile of dishes is making me nauseous. When will I ever finish this…?”

A mountain of dishes was waiting for her in the shop.

Finishing that would mark the end of her day, but this was always the toughest part.

And then her son started pestering her.

“Mom! Mom!”

“Yes?”

“Look at this!”

“Mom’s busy. I’m so tired. Later.”

“Look now~!”

Sigh.

A deep sigh escaped her lips.

She knew she shouldn’t react this way.

But sometimes, without realizing it, she let her fatigue show.

At moments like these, she found herself resenting her late husband.

And then, she hated herself for blaming him, ending up in a spiral of self-reproach.

“I need to pull myself together.”

Pushing aside the dark thoughts, Shin Yooyeon regained her composure.

“If it’s something our son thinks is fun, let’s take a look.”

“Really? It’s so funny!”

Taking off her rubber gloves, she played the video.

At first, she didn’t even realize it was a promotional clip for a presidential candidate.

The quality was so shoddy.

“Oh, my son’s hooked on some weird shorts again. Last time, it was that muscle man shouting about ‘King Jokbal Bossam’…”

This wasn’t the first time, so she let it go.

It was just a one-minute video anyway.

“Still, if my son likes it, I should watch it.”

She began watching the video, barely paying attention.

But there was a twist at the end.

An incredibly adorable child appeared.

“Candidate Kang Jiwoo, is it true that you practiced hard for this speed-talking challenge?”

“Yes! I practiced diligently..!”

“Whose child is this, so cute?”

It had been only four days since Kang Jiwoo had been transformed (TS).

For someone like Shin Yooyeon, who was indifferent to politics and overwhelmed with daily life, it was natural not to know who Kang Jiwoo was.

“The pronunciation must be quite tricky. Are you confident?”

“I practiced hard, so my pronunciation is good!”

“Adorable. She said ‘I practiced diligently.’ So cute.”

A pink-haired little one claiming her pronunciation was great.

Surely she was a child actor or a model of some sort.

With eyes as bright as a puppy’s before a treat, tiny, maple-leaf-like hands, and short yet adorable proportions straight out of a cartoon, she made anyone who watched her smile unconsciously.

And then the much-awaited challenge began.

“Will Candidate Kang Ji-woo succeed? Ready, go!”

“XXX…!”

“Hahaha, so cute~!”

Shin Yooyeon burst out laughing.

Her son laughed along, giggling uncontrollably.

“Mom! I can do this in five seconds!”

“Really? Let’s see you try.”

Her laughter brightened her mood in an instant.

Her son stumbled over the words during the challenge, and the mother and son burst into laughter together.

For that moment, there were no worries, no anxieties.

Reality’s problems didn’t matter.

They simply laughed and enjoyed their time together.

The shorts were a massive hit among elementary school kids.

And why wouldn’t they be? Kang Jiwoo was too cute and silly.

Kids who watched it couldn’t help but think, “How can you not do this?”

The tagline by Director Bong further boosted its appeal:

“If you can do this, you’re part of the world’s top 1%!”

Even the quirky party name contributed to its popularity.

Title: The Latest Buzzword Among Elementary School Kids

“My nephew was playing a game and suddenly said, ‘Thankful Tree Korea Party~.’Apparently, it’s a trend to add ‘Tree Korea Party’ to random phrases now.”

“That’s Kang Jiwoo’s party name, isn’t it? I know that, but why is it trending?”

“It’s probably because of the Farmer President shorts.”

“There’s no logic behind kids’ buzzwords. They just like random, alien-sounding stuff.”

“Hey, mister…”

The ‘Chirp-Chirp’ shorts were gradually gaining word-of-mouth attention.

The current view count was nearing a million within just a day of being uploaded.

It hadn’t yet become a major issue among voters.

This was because the algorithm only spread it to the kids’ section.

However, it seemed like only a matter of time before it became a sensation.

“As expected of Director Bong! I knew it would do well from the start!”

“See? People with field experience are just built differently!”

Party members, as if they had never doubted before, praised Bong Soohee.

Of course, not all members felt the same.

“Hmm… Is this really that impressive?”

It was Assemblyman Park Seokji.

“Honestly, wasn’t it just a lucky break? I feel like I could do better if I tried. My hobby is composing trot songs, you know. What do you think about rewriting some lyrics and performing them? And I’ll generously only take half the copyright fees!”

“Assemblyman Park, please, I beg you.”

Trot songwriting? What a talented man he is.

At times like this, you just have to compliment him and move on, Banchan hyung!

“Anyway, I’m so glad it’s doing well! Let’s get started on the next shorts right away!”

“I’ve been thinking—how about filming at an animal café? The concept would be campaigning to adorable animals.”

“Oh, that sounds super cute!”

The office was livelier than ever.

I was also happy the shorts were doing well.

Opportunities to expose your face without spending much money are rare.

“Ugh…”

We’ll have to actively shoot more shorts moving forward.

And this is only the beginning.

There’ll be interviews, rallies, and meetings with supporters to prepare for.

“Ugh, ughhh…”

I am Kang Jiwoo.

I will become South Korea’s first elementary school president.

I’ll transform this country into one that gives children dreams and hope!

“Sniff… hic…”

“But where is that crying sound coming from?”

It’s me.

I’m making that sound.

I’m currently hiding behind a curtain.

I’ve stuffed my fist in my mouth to stifle my sobbing.

“Why am I crying, you ask?”

I don’t know either, damn it.

I just feel like crying, so leave me alone…

Swish!

The curtain was drawn open.

It was Han Seoyoung who found me.

“Candidate? What are you doing here?”

“Sniff…!”

“Are you… are you crying? You’re crying, aren’t you? Why are you crying?!”

Flustered, she shouted out the fact that I was crying.

Everyone turned their attention to my tears.

Getting caught crying made me even sadder.

Tears, like chicken droppings, began to pour down.

“Candidate! Did something happen?”

“I-I’m… a fool…”

“What do you mean? Candidate, you’re not a fool!”

“The YouTube thing… hic! It’s up there… and now everyone… knows I’m a fool… waahhh… sniff!”

Once the words spilled out, I fully grasped my emotions.

“It’s because ‘Chirp-Chirp’ is recorded and out there… it’s so embarrassing…!”

It was because of the shorts.

When you think about it, it was like showing my failure to everyone.

I have a speech impediment that makes my pronunciation unclear.

On top of that, Bong Soohee declared I’d be a fool if I failed the challenge.

To me, that short video was like a nationwide declaration of my foolishness.

Of course, from an adult’s perspective, it was no big deal.

In fact, it would probably just seem cute.

But from a kid’s point of view, it was utterly humiliating.

“I-I’m sorry, Candidate…”

Han Seoyoung was at a loss, apologizing repeatedly.

Naturally, her approach didn’t resonate with a child.

Attorney Lee Soyoon, who had kids of her own, hugged me tightly.

“Who called our candidate a fool? I’ll scold them for you!”

“It was… hic… Director Bong…”

“Director Bong! Naughty naughty!”

She pretended to slap Bong Soohee.

She didn’t actually hit him—just mimed it.

Bong Soohee didn’t even react until Lee Soyoon glared at him, prompting a lifeless “Ow, ow” from him.

“Do you feel better now?”

Even so, my feelings weren’t fully soothed.

Honestly, I didn’t want to cry or sulk over something like this.

Isn’t it obvious?

My mind isn’t that of an elementary school student!

However, emotions are tied to hormones, and there’s only so much mental strength can overcome.

“Are you still upset? What should we do?”

“If the candidate is upset, we all feel sad too~”

“Shall we go buy a toy?”

These people are really testing my patience.

Do they think everything’s fine as long as it’s a toy?!

“…Yeees.”

“Then you’ll forgive me, won’t you, Candidate?”

“I’m not mad at you.”

Hmm. Guess everything works out in the end.

Awkward…

To be fair, it wasn’t without reason. Last time, I couldn’t get the Tanniping either.

That’s because Park Seokji, who said he’d give me 100,000 won, didn’t hand over the money.

“Grandpa wants to buy it for you, but I can’t. It would be a violation of the Public Official Election Act. Hohoho…”

Giving or receiving valuables during the election period is illegal!

I knew that, of course, but for some reason, I just didn’t remember at the moment.

However, buying it with my own money wouldn’t be a problem at all.

Then why not just go ahead and buy it, you ask?

Unfortunately, I didn’t have the authority to do so.

“The Candidate’s wallet is with me.”

My wallet was with Han Seoyoung.

As annoying as it was, there was a good reason for it.

“So you don’t impulsively buy a Tanniping without realizing it.”

I couldn’t even trust myself in this situation.

Honestly, it was better to have someone trustworthy like Han Seoyoung manage it for me.

“But can we just head out like this? Shouldn’t we coordinate with the store first?”

“You’re right. If too many people gather, there might be accidents. Let’s align the schedule before heading out.”

“Our Candidate is a star with 1 million views~”

They think people are going to recognize me?

There’s no way it’s that serious, right?

Why do they have this world-class delusion when even I don’t?

“Store Manager, are you busy?”

“No, why?”

A large supermarket in Incheon.

An office staff member approached the store manager.

“A politician wants to visit our store.”

“A politician?”

The store manager’s expression turned sour.

It’s election season.

Candidates are going around stirring things up under the guise of campaigning.

To be honest, from the supermarket’s perspective, there’s nothing good about it.

It’d be a relief if they didn’t cause trouble with their entourage of bodyguards, supporters, and party members.

“Tell them not to come. They’re just a nuisance, aren’t they?”

“Right? Then I’ll pass that on.”

As the staff turned to leave, the store manager stopped them.

“Wait, who is it? Cho Seoyoung? Yoo Hangseol?”

“Who was it again… I think it was Kang Jiwoo?”

“K-Kang Jiwoo?!”

The store manager jumped up from their chair.

“Why are you so surprised?”

“Tell them they’re welcome!”

“What? But didn’t you just say they’d be a nuisance?”

“It’s election season! You know, the biggest festival in a democratic nation! A festival, I say! Shouldn’t we do our part too? Don’t you think?”

“?”

The manager’s phone was tightly gripped in their hand.

On the screen was a post being drafted on an online community.

[Politics Board]

Title: Holding my breath until the Kids’ President gets elected Author: Tuttatta