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The Response Bureau is right next to the landfill—or, to be precise, it’s separated from the landfill by just a single wall.
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“So stinky!”
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I held my nose with both hands.
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“This is way too smelly!”
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Lu Xiu seemed used to it. He walked in, expressionless.
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“No helping it. We’re broke,” he explained as he walked. “The Response Bureau is really poor, especially in a small city like Bian Du.”
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“The budget’s tight. Most of it goes to compensation for losses and post-disaster rebuilding. That’s why it’s next to the landfill—the land here’s cheap.”
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Inside, there was an old, shabby lobby, and directly across from the entrance was a glass reception counter. A few people sat inside, dozing or chatting out of boredom.
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When they saw us enter, they barely glanced over before looking away.
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Lu Xiu didn’t pause. He led me around the counter and into a deeper hallway.
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“This is the Response Bureau’s front disguise—a neighborhood affairs office.”
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“Is it edible?”
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“No, you can’t eat it.”
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“Why not?”
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“Because I said so.”
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He actually discussed this strange topic with me, dead serious.
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Inside, there was an elevator plastered with red double-happiness symbols and some ancient, peeling posters. Under the flickering lights, it all looked eerie and sinister.
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Lu Xiu casually pressed a button. The elevator doors opened, revealing four or five people inside.
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Calling them “people” was a stretch. I didn’t smell anything human from them—just a heavy stench of rot.
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One was a woman in a red bridal gown, a veil over her head, holding hands with another figure in a black Ghost Groom suit.
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The other two circled them, like wedding escorts. Their faces were deathly pale, cheeks smeared with blood-red blush, twisted in bizarre smiles.
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“Are you scared?”
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Seeing me hide behind him, Lu Xiu raised an eyebrow and smirked wickedly.
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“Who—who’s scared? They just smell bad… Really stinky…”
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“Well, they’re dead, after all. These are Earthbound Spirits bound to this elevator. Registration number: GD-03213. A non-existent elevator, Class: Strange.”
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“It can take you to any floor of any building in this city with an elevator, but the price is that you can’t meet the Ghost Bride’s eyes—otherwise you’ll be trapped here forever, just like those two poor souls.”
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He pointed at the two wedding escorts.
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“As long as you don’t trigger that rule, you’re safe. You could even dance in the elevator if you wanted.”
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“But they stink so much.” I added, “Worse than the landfill.”
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“Deal with it. If you can’t even handle this, you’ll never be a qualified hound. In the end, you’ll either return to the black box or become a lab rat for the White Tower.”
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Pinching my nose, I followed him into the elevator. The stench of decay got even worse—I almost vomited up my breakfast.
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Just then, a pair of hands settled on my shoulders.
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“Cut it out!”
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I was in a foul mood.
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“Huh?”
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Lu Xiu heard my voice and turned around.
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I looked at him again. He was in front of me, both hands hanging at his sides.
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Turning my head, I glanced at the hands on my shoulders—pale, faintly marbled with corpse spots, nails long and blood-red as if dripping.
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“Lu Xiu, I want to go back.”
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Before he could answer, a hoarse voice, rough as sandpaper, sounded behind me, mournful and lingering: “All living things suffer. Why not rest in peace?”
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Then, the Ghost Groom spoke, dully intoning, “Only silence is eternal.”
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“To exist is original sin. Annihilation is liberation.” At that, the wedding escorts turned around, their gazes falling upon Lu Xiu and me, mouths splitting open with a mix of dark red blood.
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“Shit!”
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For the first time, Lu Xiu cursed, pulling out a silver-and-black pistol from his pocket.
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***
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But the very next moment, the elevator lights snapped off. An ear-piercing scraping rang out as the entire elevator shook violently.
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The elevator plunged downward!
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Bang! Bang! Bang!
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From outside, wild pounding erupted—like something insane was battering the elevator doors.
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“Hiss—”
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The hand on my shoulder suddenly tightened, razor-sharp nails piercing into my flesh with a needling pain.
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Hurts! Hurts! Hurts!
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Damn it, damn it, damn it!
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I twisted around and bit down on that hand with all my strength.
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Squelch—
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Rotten, sour liquid splattered onto my face, but it only made me fiercer.
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Crunch—
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At last, I bit through that hand, flesh, bone, and all.
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“Ptooey! Ptooey!”
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I spat out the sour, metallic-tasting muck and broke free while it slackened its grip.
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“Lu Xiu!”
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My voice echoed in the cramped elevator.
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Click.
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The restrainer on my left hand snapped open.
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Rip—
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That was my clothes tearing. The Tongue Beast in my abdomen roared open, its huge tongue slamming hard behind me.
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BOOM—!
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The entire elevator shuddered, dropping even faster. I could even smell a scorched, tarry stink, like melting asphalt.
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“Hurry! Smash the elevator—we have to get out, now!”
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Lu Xiu’s voice sounded from behind. Hearing the order, I didn’t hesitate. I gathered all my strength into my belly’s tongue.
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BOOM!!!
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In the darkness, the whole elevator slammed into the deep-black ground. The cabin twisted and ripped apart in an ear-splitting shriek, sparks flying from shards—then everything faded into deeper darkness.
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The world returned to silence.
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“Hah… Hah… Haicao Tuan, I just saved your life again.”
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One hand grabbed Lu Xiu, my belly’s giant maw wrapped around a steel bar jutting from the wall, swinging us back and forth.
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Below was the elevator’s wreckage, dust slowly settling to reveal the ruins—half of it jutting up, the other half oddly swallowed by darkness.
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At least ten meters down.
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…Hiss.
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He groaned in pain.
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“What a…”
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He looked down as well, sighed, and summed up our day in advance.
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“A total disaster.”
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“So what do we do now?”
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“…Let’s see if we can find a safe place first…”
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“Haicao Tuan.”
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“What?”
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“You’re too heavy. The rebar’s about to break.”
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In the end, Lu Xiu fished a huge cloth out of his Miao Miao Pocket, spread it out in midair, and caught us.
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“Amazing.”
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I lay at the edge of the slowly descending cloth, peering below in genuine awe.
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“Don’t celebrate yet—we need to figure out where we are. This definitely isn’t the Response Bureau, and it’s not any normal space.”
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He rubbed his head and looked up. Above us stretched an endless, pitch-black void.
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It felt like we were trapped in an eternal elevator shaft, its depth unfathomable.
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Sniff, sniff.
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“You’re bleeding?”
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I smelled a faint trace of blood on him.
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“Yeah… got scratched a few times. Luckily, my face isn’t ruined.”
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“What’s ‘ruined’? Can you eat it?”
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As the big cloth landed on the ground and covered the elevator wreck, as for the Ghost Bride and Groom inside—there was no telling them apart now.
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Click—
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The lights flickered on. Instinctively, I shut my eyes to lessen the glare.
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After a moment, I opened them again.
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Lu Xiu held a flashlight in one hand, knocking on the wall with the other—but all he got was a metallic clang.
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That scorched smell still lingered, not as bad as the elevator but still unpleasant.
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I figured I wouldn’t be able to eat anything today.
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“No signal at all… it’s like a completely sealed place.”
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He put his phone away.
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“Haicao Tuan, do you think we’ve fallen into hell?”
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Instinctively, I edged closer to him.
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Surprisingly, he didn’t deny it. “It’s possible… But it’s just close to hell. Real hell isn’t like this.”
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“You’ve been?”
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“No.”
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“Then why are you so sure?”
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“I’ve seen photos. Someone from the Response Bureau’s been there.”
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He found a spot to sit down.
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“What’s it like?” I pressed.
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“Hmm… Hard to say. The ground is white—everywhere is white. There are no other colors.”
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“Sounds boring.”
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“Yeah.”
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After that, we fell into silence again.
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Soon, I saw Lu Xiu take out a piece of paper and scribble. The scratch of his pen echoed in the empty shaft, with a strangely rhythmic cadence.
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“What are you doing?!”
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“Writing.”
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“Writing what?”
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“Do you remember what those Earthbound Spirits in the elevator said?”
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“Mm… I forgot.”
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“Pretty much what I’d expect from you.”
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I punched him.
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“What they said… was the Nirvana Society’s slogan.”
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“Nirvana Society? Can you eat it?”
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He rolled his eyes and went on.
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“Nirvana Society is a cult that worships nothingness… They believe everything should return to the void.”
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“They’re the Response Bureau’s top enemy, because the nothingness they worship would drag the whole world into a disaster called [Calamity].”
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“[Calamity]?” What’s that?
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“An avalanche of mistakes—the end of civilization. Basically, all the disasters that could destroy the world. Back then, Qu Le made a deal with the Demon of Possibility in hopes of finding a way to avoid Calamity.”
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He bowed his head, writing earnestly on the paper.
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“It’s too complicated for you. Just remember, Calamity is bad. It would wipe out everything tasty—got it?”
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“Calamity is awful!”
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Does it want to kill me?
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I can’t even imagine a world with nothing to eat.
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“As long as you get it. If you ever meet someone from the Nirvana Society, just hit them as hard as you can.”
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“Can I eat them?”
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“If you’re not afraid of an upset stomach…”
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Our conversation over, Lu Xiu folded his written paper into the shape of an ingot, pulled a red candle and a yellow talisman from his pocket, wrapped the ingot in the talisman, lit the candle, and let it hang upside down, letting the wax drip onto the talisman as he chanted:
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“I respectfully invoke Qingniao as messenger. This is a document from the Response Bureau, sent by Lu Xiu. Transform this ingot into a letter, burn this talisman as the medium. Deliver the message swiftly, with no error. By the authority of law, make it so.”
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Was he performing some ritual?
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I saw the falling wax suddenly flare up with blue smoke, burning away in an instant, not even ash left—everything fused into the smoke, then coalesced into a hazy bird, which dissolved into the space.
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“What was that?”
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I walked over and waved my hand. Nothing.
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“Qingniao.”
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“Burning stuff.”
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I meant, what were you doing just now?
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“Are you stupid?!”
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I yelled, frustrated, since he clearly didn’t get what I meant!
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“Hah, now you know how suffocating it feels to deal with you.”
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“You jerk! I’ll eat you!”
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“Then I’ll fry you with lightning.”
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“Hmph.”
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I glared at him, then turned away, deciding to ignore him. If anything happened next, I wouldn’t save him.
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But after a while, he didn’t apologize. I peeked over and found he’d actually fallen asleep on the cloth.
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Hmph!
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Just sleep forever! If something dangerous happens, I won’t even say a word, I’ll just run!
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I sat cross-legged on the ground, starting to count on my fingers.
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This was destined to be a boring stretch of time.
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