Battle Lounge.
A game synonymous with the battle royale genre.
The game starts with 25 squads, each consisting of four players.
The last squad standing wins, fighting against the ever-shrinking safe zone.
It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that this is one of the most commercially successful battle royale games.
Ironically, though, the game itself is extremely difficult.
After all, securing first place among 25 squads is no easy feat.
But despite that, the reason I decided to give this game a shot is simple:
Battle Lounge is a game where streamers frequently collaborate, and tournaments are held regularly.
As is common in the battle royale genre, the looting phase can be dull.
To give an extreme example, you might spend 25 minutes tirelessly looting, only to get one-tapped with a headshot the moment a fight breaks out.
That’s just how battle royale games are.
In other words, Battle Lounge offers plenty of time for team banter.
There’s no better game for co-op streams.
Obviously, I have no intention of becoming some isolated island of a VTuber.
I have staked my life on streaming.
And I don’t mean that figuratively.
If I don’t stream, I might as well be dead—so saying I put my life on this isn’t an exaggeration.
For an internet content creator, networking is more important than people realize.
Only those who already have a massive following can afford to be loners.
But I’m just a rookie who recently debuted.
If there’s an opportunity to network, I need to take it.
If I qualify for a tournament, I should sign up without hesitation.
For that reason, having experience playing Battle Lounge would be incredibly beneficial to my future streams.
[Anonymous Star Evangelist has donated 2,000 KRW.]
“So, have you played this game before?”
“No, it’s my first time.”
I already told you—I don’t usually play games.
If I have time to play games, I’d rather watch Ayase’s stream.
“But I’ve watched a lot.”
Cue the meme response:
“Oh god, the macro response #1 again.”
“Of course you’ve watched a lot, sure thing, buddy.”
“???: Loaderna? I’ve watched a lot.”
“???: Horror game? I’ve watched a lot.”
“Bro, what’s the point of watching a lot if your skills are absolute garbage?”
“Maybe they’ll actually be good at shooting…?”
“LMAO, military-trained high school girl moment.”
“No, but Battle Lounge is different! It’s a team game. Since I’ve watched a lot, I can at least pull my weight.”
“Loaderna is a team game too, you absolute dumbass.”
“Where’s the mod? Get this troll out of here.”
“Will the cult leader get reported for trolling today? Yes or no?”
“No debate, absolutely.”
“Are you joking? No contest.”
“Rigged as hell, no contest.”
“Getting reported for trolling and ending up on the Battle Royale forums is part of the tradition.”
[Anonymous has donated 2,000 KRW.]
“Screw it, let’s go for the world’s first hidden achievement: getting labeled a troll in every game I touch.”
No, this time it’s actually different.
Battle Lounge is a team game.
…Okay, fine, so is Loaderna, which is a 5-player team game.
But in a game like an AOS (MOBA), your role is decided from the start.
If you completely screw up your lane, there’s no recovering from it, and getting carried by teammates becomes nearly impossible.
But in a battle royale game like Battle Lounge, as long as there’s someone in the squad who can shoot well, I can just ride along.
My role?
Human backpack.
Smoke grenades, frags, ammo, healing supplies—you name it.
If I can be a useful pack mule, I don’t even need to hold a gun to contribute.
“Oh, at least they know their place.”
“Actually, when you think about it, they might have a real shot at winning.”
“If they get lucky with teammates, they could theoretically win, yeah.”
“Loaderna was impossible since they solo-fed 20 deaths, but this… this is actually possible.”
“Are we going for a Chicken Dinner challenge?”
“Is this a ‘clear the game in one sitting’ stream?”
“No, I’m definitely not doing that.”
The goal today is just to get a Chicken Dinner (win), not to suffer through a ‘clear in one go’ challenge.
I’ve learned my lesson before.
The moment I firmly declared that I wouldn’t be doing an endurance stream…
[Mission Donation]
‘Anonymous Star Brilliance’ has donated 1,000,000 KRW!
Mission: Get a Chicken Dinner.
“Oh my god, our sponsor has made another huge offering…!”
This is the same person who previously proposed the ‘Loaderna Placement Exam’ challenge.
And now, they’ve put up a million won for this mission.
I still don’t like their username, but…
1,000,000 KRW is 1,000,000 KRW.
Even Brilliant Star would have to acknowledge this.
Wouldn’t they?
BONK.
“Ow.”
“???”
“Why’d they suddenly slam their head?”
“And so it begins…”
“WWE ON.”
…Or not. Never mind.
Since Battle Lounge has 25 squads per match, in theory, if I play 25 games, I should be able to win at least once.
With a solid justification now in place thanks to the one million won mission,
“Alright then, let’s go get that Chicken Dinner.”
Time to show them what a real Level 4 backpack can do.
I shall show the disciples properly.
My gun barrel shines.
The trigger delivers judgment.
I gladly avenge the heretics, Repay blasphemy with blasphemy.
Oh, Brilliant Star, Keep me by your side, Raise me among your followers.
Those who seek to destroy another’s faith, Shall lose their own.
This is…
The will of the Brilliant Star.
…Or so I thought.
“GYYAAAAAAAAAAAH!”
My gun barrel did shine, sure.
But it didn’t deliver any judgment.
My aim shot straight up into the sky.
I was the one who spotted the enemy first, unloaded a full magazine—thirty bullets—
and didn’t land a single shot.
Is this even real?
This game is a hundred times harder to play than it looks.
The recoil control is on a whole different level of insanity.
Being a human backpack only works if you survive the early fight.
But survival?
I got first blooded four games in a row.
Correction.
Five games in a row.
I was the first to die out of all 100 players.
[“Ultimate Trash-tier Troll Ijia” has donated 1,000 KRW.]
“At this point, isn’t this a talent?”
[“Bacreet” has donated 3,000 KRW.]
“Dude, getting first blooded isn’t even that easy, but four times in a row? LMAOOOO”
[“Ultra Delight Mountain” has donated 4,000 KRW.]
“I passed through the uncanny valley and now I’m just having a blast LMAOOO”
“No, this is straight-up unfair! This isn’t my fault, it’s my teammates’ fault!”
“Yeah, but your teammates were actually insane LMAO.”
“That’s just a normal casual game, dude.”
“If you’re mad, go play ranked… Oh wait, you can’t LMFAO.”
“They can’t play ranked because of level restrictions.”
Getting first blooded isn’t something to be proud of, obviously.
But it’s not entirely my fault either.
“Dakkol.”
Short for Dae-Kkol—”Big City Diving” or “Big Brain Diving.”
It’s a playstyle where, instead of safely looting, you drop straight into a high-risk city and get into nonstop fights from the start.
Since this was just a casual match, nobody was desperate to win.
And as a result, I ended up with four consecutive squads of dopamine-addicted maniacs who were hardwired for violence.
Four games.
Four times, my squad hard-dropped into a meat grinder.
I never even planned to shoot anyone…
But at this rate, I couldn’t even be a human backpack, let alone a meat shield.
But I refused to give up.
The next game started.
And yet again, my squad was filled with dopamine-craving lunatics.
This time, I had a new goal:
Survival.
As soon as we landed in the city, I ran straight into a building.
I didn’t even loot.
I dashed into a bathroom and slammed the door shut.
Trembling.
Shaking.
“Bruh, is this a horror game? LMAOOOO”
“WTF are you even doing???”
“Dude, there’s a fully kitted AR outside, GO LOOT IT!!”
I don’t care.
Screw looting.
This time, I refuse to be first blood.
After 30 seconds of hiding in the bathroom, the original 100 players in the lobby had already dropped to 70.
I… I did it!
I avoided first blood!
Mission accomplished—
Tap tap tap tap.
Click.
BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG!
“GYYAAAAAAAAAAAH!”
Crisis always strikes when you least expect it.
The bathroom door suddenly burst open.
A masked freak in a giant bunny costume unloaded an entire mag into me.
I screamed with 200% of my soul.
I almost dropped my soul…!
This game.
It’s not a battle royale.
It’s a horror game.
Shockingly, I was the last survivor of my team.
This was…
Yeah, this was hopeless.
Just one more game.
Just one.
If the next match is just as bad…
Screw the mission money, screw the collabs, screw the tournaments—I’m just bailing.
“Fact. Nothing’s gonna change in the next game either.”
“Casual games are always like this LOL.”
“Oh, you actually thought you’d get to shoot a gun?”
“If you wanted a serious match, you should’ve gone ranked, bro.”
Yeah…
I doubt the next game will be any different.
It seems like casual matches are just crawling with dopamine junkies who only know how to hot drop.
[“Dipped Pineapple Pizza” has donated 10,000 KRW.]
“Jia, wanna hear a pro tip?”
“…What is it? I appreciate the ten bucks, but if it’s some weird tip again…”
[“Dipped Pineapple Pizza” has donated another 10,000 KRW.]
“Go to settings. Turn on in-game voice chat. As soon as the match starts, just say ‘Hello.’ After that, the blessings of Brilliant Star shall be upon you.”
“Ugh, I KNEW it was gonna be some weird advice!”
“No, wait, that’s actually real advice though??”
“That’s… kinda genius when you think about it.”
“This is it.”
“Using voice chat can actually rewire these dopamine-addicted maniacs into normal players.”
“…THAT’S supposed to be a pro tip??”
Why?
How does using in-game voice chat change anything?
As I questioned it, chat was spamming the same response:
“Hard to explain, just try it and you’ll see.”
I still didn’t get it.
But… whatever.
Nothing to lose.
Game starts.
[“Hot drop?”]
[“Hot drop, let’s go.”]
[“Slam it down.”]
Once again.
I got matched with three dopamine-fueled lunatics who only knew how to YOLO.
Alright.
This is where the magic happens, right?
I turned on in-game voice chat.
And just like chat told me—
“Hello.”
The atmosphere shifted.
A few seconds of silence.
And then—
[“Uh… should we play safe?”]
[“Yeah, sometimes slow looting isn’t bad.”]
[“Let’s actually try to win this one.”]
The dopamine junkies…
They…
transformed.
With just one greeting.
They became rational, strategic, slow-looting players.
…BUT WHY?
WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED?