Chapter 88:Is It Okay? (6)

“Shihyun? Terrified?”  

Kalia asked back, as if she couldn’t believe Arna’s story.  

“I’m not sure if ‘terrified’ is the right word… It was more like he was being intensely wary of something.”  

“Wary? Inside this house?”  

Dana questioned with a slightly confused expression.  

“Could there really be something going on…”  

Fia murmured, sounding a bit concerned.  

To the four of them, including Arna, who had just shared the story, Shihyun was the epitome of a brave hero.  

Of course, he hadn’t always been like that from the beginning. When Shihyun first arrived in Irrelcia, he didn’t appear to be particularly extraordinary. His strength was below that of an average commoner. His speed was entirely unremarkable, and his stamina could easily be described as subpar.  

If anything, had he been born into nobility, it might not have been considered such a flaw. Shihyun was reasonably intelligent and had quickly adapted to Irrelcia’s various knowledge and ways of life.  

If there was one thing about him that stood out, it was his dedication.  

No one told him to, but he woke up at dawn to train. His training regimen mostly consisted of repeating what he had learned the day before.  

He never missed a day of training. Even when he didn’t seem to be in the best condition, or even when he was slightly unwell, he made sure to go through at least the bare minimum of training to maintain his edge.  

After training, he would reflect on what he had learned and continue strengthening his body, even during his rest time.  

His once-weak strength and stamina soon turned into something formidable. While his physique might have looked ordinary at a glance, his skills developed far faster than others.

Kalia, who was also his instructor, had been so impressed by his progress that she believed he must have truly been sent by the goddess.  

And yet, the reason Shihyun trained so hard wasn’t to climb the social ladder. It was purely to help others and to carry out the goddess’s request to the best of his ability.  

Had Shihyun been a selfish brute who wielded the holy sword without a shred of justice, the four Kalia included would never have acknowledged him as a hero.

In fact, they wouldn’t even have considered joining his party in the first place.  

It was precisely because of this that it was so difficult for them to accept that the brave Shihyun had been cowering and trembling with fear every night.  

“The prophet said this could happen, so I suppose it’s possible,”  

Arna said, trying to keep her tone calm, though the shadow on her face betrayed her unease. Lowering her head slightly as she spoke, her face fell into the shadow cast by the LED light shining above.

Perhaps it was because she was bringing up something she had promised to keep secret from Shihyun.  

“And, well… there were a few times on the battlefield when he showed similar signs. Though, back then, I didn’t think of it as fear…”  

“He was always the one leading at the frontlines.”  

Fia picked up where Arna left off.  

“Even against overwhelmingly strong enemies, he never faltered. Even when he fought the Demon King in the end…”  

“…….”  

Silence fell over the group.  

Although they had heard some things from the goddess, none of them had truly realized the severity of what Shihyun was going through until Arna brought it up.  

They had thought that just being with him would be enough.  

“…Now that it’s come to this, let’s all be honest.”  

After a brief pause, Kalia was the first to break the silence.  

“Since then, I’ve been afraid to hold a sword.”  

At Kalia’s words, Fia, Dana, and Arna all turned their gazes to her at once. Their expressions were full of surprise, as though they had never heard such a thing before. Kalia merely shrugged and said,  

“Of course, you wouldn’t know. We haven’t had any reason to wield swords since then. I’ve been busy with family matters, and you all had your own… well…”  

She trailed off, remembering how Dana and Arna had shut themselves away in their rooms, overwhelmed by despair after Shihyun’s death.  

To steer the conversation away, Kalia smoothly changed the subject and continued,  

“Back then, I leapt forward in Shihyun’s place to face the Demon King. And I failed. I was struck down and sent flying. If it weren’t for you all, I would’ve died on the spot.”  

Of course, Kalia’s actions in the battle against the Demon King had been far from meaningless. If she hadn’t charged in, Shihyun would have taken that attack instead, and in that case, none of them might have survived to sit here today.  

But Kalia chose not to dwell on that point and kept speaking.  

“The final blow was struck by Shihyun. And the Demon King fell.”  

Then, as foretold, the Demon King unleashed his last, desperate outburst.  

In his death throes, the sealed magic within his body went berserk, ravaging everything around him.  

At the time, a significant number of the Demon King’s forces were still within his castle, ready to unleash their fury.

Surrounding the castle to prevent them from escaping was the kingdom’s army—a force largely made up of the kingdom’s primary working class.  

These soldiers were the ones who would return after the war to rebuild the ruined cities, farm the land, and raise the next generation. They were the future of the kingdom.  

Though not the entire army, a substantial portion of the kingdom’s forces were gathered there. If they were all wiped out, the kingdom would suffer an unimaginable blow.  

Moreover, if the saint, the Tower Master, and the elf blessed with the power of the World Tree were lost, purifying the corrupted mana left behind would take an enormous amount of time.  

It had been a battle where everything was on the line.  

And paradoxically, the least impactful presence in that critical moment had been Kalia, who ironically held the highest rank among them.  

“I tried, at the very least, to protect what I could. But… that was it.”  

“……”  

No one could respond to Kalia’s words. They didn’t know how to comfort her.  

“My shield, my sword, failed to do anything at the most crucial moment. That’s what I thought. And when that thought took hold, I became terrified. Terrified of picking up a sword. Terrified of standing in front of others, claiming I could protect them. I volunteered to guard the hero, but in the end, I failed to fulfill my final duty.”  

Kalia lifted her head as she finished her confession. She turned her gaze to Fia and added,  

“And to make it worse, I ended up being a burden at the very end.”  

She seemed to be referring to the moment she had collapsed and needed Fia’s healing.  

“That’s not true!”  

Fia’s voice rose in protest.  

If they were to recount everything, Kalia had taken the attack in Shihyun’s stead, saving his life. Saying she had failed to protect the hero didn’t make sense, and her words contradicted what actually happened.

Shihyun had willingly sacrificed himself in the end, and that was all.  

But Kalia didn’t bother to agree or argue against Fia’s outcry. She simply shrugged again, as if to brush it off.  

“So, this is what I’m dealing with. I’m scared of picking up my weapon again. I’m terrified of failing to protect the people I want to protect, even if I do pick it up. It’s not something a knight captain should be saying, I know.”  

She then looked around at Fia, Dana, and Arna.  

“I don’t want to assume, but I’d wager that each of you has at least one part of yourself that’s changed since the war. If we’re going to do this, let’s just lay it all out. After all, if we can’t face our own wounds, there’s no way we can hope to heal anyone else’s.”  

“…..”  

At Kalia’s words, the group fell silent for a moment.  

“………I…”  

The first to speak up was Dana.  

“I can’t stop thinking about how I failed to complete my theory in time during that final moment. It’s haunted me ever since.

Even now, it’s all I can focus on. Nothing else matters to me only perfecting the magic that will stop and destroy the next Demon King. Because of that… I can’t even think of any other spells.”  

Dana ran her hand over her face.  

As if opening up had lifted a small weight off her shoulders, she continued speaking.  

“I know there’s a lot I should’ve been doing after the war ended. Of course, the mages at the Tower didn’t just sit idle, but I knew there were so many tasks and studies I could’ve joined to speed up progress. But I didn’t.

Because that unfinished theory kept running through my mind. I couldn’t focus on anything else until I completed it.”  

She took a deep breath, her shoulders rising briefly before falling again.  

“…..Shihyun died because I didn’t finish that theory in time.”  

Her voice broke as her shoulders slumped.  

No one could respond to her words. No one could affirm or deny them.  

There were countless achievements the party had been able to accomplish because Dana was there. Without her, they wouldn’t have even made it to the Demon King’s castle in the first place.  

But even so, her words were something only Dana herself could truly grasp.  

Whether the theory had been completed earlier or later, that responsibility rested solely on Dana as the Master of the Magic Tower. None of the others could find the right words to say.