Everyone has a mental breaking point.
No matter how much you try to endure, no matter how much you want to hold on, there’s a threshold you simply cannot surpass.
Joan had long since crossed that line.
“I’m tired now.”
Below her, the Holy Emperor was in seclusion, and so the entire Goddess Church leaned heavily on her.
Above her, the useless Goddess did nothing but scold her every day, demanding she capture Ishmael.
And that’s not all—there were internal power struggles, too.
Idiots who wanted to kill her and take her place as the next Saint, hyenas trying to steal her power.
She was surrounded by enemies and burdened by useless deadweight.
“How long do I have to keep cleaning up everyone else’s mess?”
This was far more than what a girl barely past twenty could bear.
Even veteran clergy or seasoned politicians would find the responsibilities crushing.
Everything had fallen on her shoulders—how could anyone endure this?
If it were only up to her heart, she would’ve quit long ago.
Thrown away the title of Saint, the power, all of it—just to go live in seclusion somewhere.
But her strong sense of duty and a lack of a real way out kept her hanging on for over a year.
And then, this meeting happened—right when that sense of duty was beginning to waver.
“Ishmael.”
“Yes, speak.”
“Do you intend to keep sowing chaos in the world?”
“Of course.”
Following the clues given by the Goddess, Joan found Ishmael in the capital.
He was out shopping with his companion when the Saint apprehended him.
At first, she tried to persuade him.
Begged him to stop spreading his wicked ideology.
She didn’t ask him to be a saint, just to have a shred of compassion for fellow humans.
“Why? Isn’t it too cruel to your own kind—”
“They’re not my kind. Never thought they were.”
But she soon realized something.
She couldn’t expect a sense of kinship from someone like Ishmael, who came from another world.
For him, shared appearance meant nothing—his priorities were based on personal interests and attachments.
“Shall I be honest? To me, you humans and the demons are all the same. Both are just other species to me.”
From his standpoint, everyone was an alien species—why should he favor humans?
They had neither helped him nor shown him kindness.
Choosing the group he found more familiar wasn’t betrayal or ingratitude.
It was simply a rational decision made by an outsider forced into a survival struggle he never asked for.
“But countless innocent people are dying because of you!”
“Innocent? Isn’t it a crime to worship a corrupt goddess and oppress innocent demons?”
“T-That’s…”
She tried appealing to morality, but that failed, too.
In the end, she was the one scolded.
He asked whether a religion that turns an innocent race into objects of hatred and persecution could ever be considered righteous.
And she couldn’t refute him—because even to her, his point made sense.
“Come to think of it… why are we taught to hate demons?”
Sure, demons didn’t believe in the Goddess.
But considering the church’s discriminatory teachings, that was only natural.
Beyond that, there didn’t seem to be any real reason to consider them enemies.
There was no justifiable basis in the scriptures or oracles to justify the repeated demon-hatred.
She had accepted it without question until now, but suddenly it struck her as strange.
“Why?”
It was only natural for the Goddess to favor her own creations, the humans.
But demons were her creations, too—so why the stark difference in treatment?
It was as if one side wasn’t her creation at all.
“And I told you last time, didn’t I?”
“…Yes?”
“Even if I stop now, the world won’t return to normal. Without interference, it’s doomed either way.”
And when she heard that there was no longer any way to save things— Joan Ayendenara, the Saint, finally broke.
“Fine. Let’s stop here.”
She had no logic to persuade him.
No justification to make him agree.
Most of all, she no longer had the will to continue.
What was the point of trying any longer?
No matter what she did, the world was going to fall apart anyway.
“I need to find my own happiness, too.”
She was sick of a life spent cleaning up messes like some glorified servant of the church.
Hadn’t she done enough already?
She didn’t want to waste any more of her energy on things that no longer helped her in life.
She just wanted to rest comfortably.
Having spent most of her life serving and helping others, now it was time to live for herself.
“I’m sorry, but don’t think of going back. A high-priority target came to us on their own, and we’re not kind enough to just let them go.”
Kalia’s declaration of kidnapping and confinement was like a lifeline.
‘If I go back, it’ll be hard to quit, right?’
Even if she declared her retirement from the order, it wouldn’t be taken seriously.
She’d probably get cursed by the oracle.
At worst, they might lock her up, calling her crazy.
If that’s the case, it might be better to just follow them.
“Are you planning to kidnap me? Do as you wish. I’m not planning to resist, so please be gentle.”
It didn’t matter if the treatment wasn’t good.
It was better than the life of constantly dealing with administrative work, mass services, and meeting important people every day.
If she cooperated quietly, at least they’d give her enough food.
With this optimistic expectation in mind, Joan stretched her hand forward.
*****
“…..”
We couldn’t hide our surprise.
This unexpected gesture was so out of the blue.
What could this mean?
This lady.
She came out of nowhere, begged, and when that didn’t work, she just surrendered.
‘Uh, should we catch her?’
‘Yeah, we should.’
Anyway, she was saying she’d follow quietly, so there was no reason to refuse.
If they didn’t need to use force, it was a win for us.
“Do you have anyone with you?”
“I do, but we separated earlier. I ran after Ishmael and left them behind.”
Although the war had made things tense, the marketplace was still crowded with people.
If they had split up here, it would be difficult to meet again.
If she’d been following, she would’ve entered this store by now, so there was no worry about being tracked.
“Where are you planning to send me? Are you going to lock me up here, or send me to another country?”
“…..That’s something we’ll decide slowly.”
As a Saint, she was a high-value hostage, comparable to a leader of any major nation.
It was the same when the Holy Emperor was in power, and even more so now that the Holy Emperor was under house arrest.
Even if someone lost their limbs, they could still be treated by the highest-level saintly magic, so their treatment couldn’t be decided carelessly.
First, I’d report to Mahdi and then decide slowly.
“Ishmael, I’ll take the Saint. Clean up and follow me slowly.”
“Okay.”
At Kalia’s request, I nodded without hesitation.
But, was it just my imagination, or did her expression look strangely filled with venom?
*****
There was a secret passage inside the cafe.
It was an emergency route, complicatedly leading to a location near the Allein branch through underground tunnels.
Originally, it was made for escape in case the branch was discovered, but it could also be used to transport hostages like this.
“This way, Saint. Be careful, the floor is slippery.”
“Thank you. Your name… was Kalia, right?”
Because of that, it was also a good place to have secret conversations.
No matter how loudly you spoke, it would only echo inside the passage and never be heard outside.
“Just call me the branch leader. It doesn’t seem like we’re close enough to call each other by name.”
“Sorry, sorry…”
While secretly transporting the Saint, Kalia suddenly stopped, turned to her, and revealed her true nature.
“Let me say this before we arrive. While you’re staying at our branch, you won’t have any discomfort. I’ll make sure you have the best food and sleeping arrangements.”
I’ll make sure to treat you as befits your status.
It won’t be perfect, but I’ll do my best within what’s possible.
“But there’s one rule that you must absolutely follow.”
“What… what is it?”
“Don’t flirt with my man.”
“…Excuse me?”
The Saint’s eyes widened at the unexpected statement.
Before she could even respond, Kalia pressured her.
With her superior physique, she pushed her up against the wall, pressing their chests together and creating no distance between them.
“Ah?!”
“Ishmael is my man. We’ve already done everything together—kissed, lived together, and slept together. Don’t even dream about interfering in our relationship.”
“I don’t particularly have feelings for Ishmael…”
“Well, who knows the heart of a person? You say that now, but who knows what will happen later?”
Every woman is a potential rival.
A bitch who’s after my husband’s precious child and seat beside him.
That was Kalia’s philosophy.
Any female demon who had a lover would probably agree.
“So I’m warning you in advance. Love and romance are your freedom, but if the person is Ishmael… it won’t be fun. Not at all.”
What if they even held hands?
That would be the day the Saint would be stuffed into a barrel and thrown into the sea.
Ismael would be shackled with chains, cuffs, and a collar, forever confined in a place only Kalia knew.
“From the wedding hall to the funeral hall.
Until the day he dies and is buried in his grave.
The only woman who will be by Ishmael’s side is me.
I’m the only one who will take care of his life, share affection with him, offer him my body, bear his child, and be responsible for his happiness.
Do you understand?”
The Saint nodded vigorously, signaling her agreement.
If she hesitated here, she felt like she might actually be ‘disappeared.’
“Good. Remember this and keep it in mind. Then, the Saint and I can live in peace.”
“Yes…”
Only then did Kalia seem satisfied and smiled.
Later, the Saint reflected on this moment.
She had never felt the madness of a person so intensely before.
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