I was used to meeting the public.
Even if it wasn’t a campaign rally, there were always a few people who recognized me when I walked around.
I’m not bragging about being popular or anything.
I was just a politician known for having a close relationship with citizens.
But I didn’t want to get this close.
“Oh, how adorable! How can someone be so cute? Looks like you popped right out of a comic book~”
A woman, who could have been my older sister, pinched my cheeks and stretched them.
Because Bong Sohee had permitted the filming, I ended up posing for photos like a celebrity.
“What’s your name?”
“Kang Jiw…”
“Oh, I see~ Are you an elementary student?”
“No, I’m a candidate for president…”
“President? You mean that’s your dream?”
“It’s not a dream… I’m currently running…”
The woman didn’t really listen to me.
She probably thought it was just a child’s fantasy.
How unfair.
I really am a candidate!
“Please vote for me, candidate number five…”
“Sure, sure. Smile, say cheese~”
I tried to make it clear, but that was the best I could do.
Of course, no adults believed me.
‘I guess there’s no need to announce it now.’
I could kind of tell what Bong Soohee was thinking.
She’s a publicity expert.
She’s likely planning to casually drop the news about my transformation after taking tons of photos, grabbing public attention.
“Let’s take one more photo~”
When the woman wanted another picture with me, Bong Sohee intervened sharply.
“Time’s up. Next, please.”
“Just one more shot. That one was blurry.”
“If you keep doing this, we’ll be leaving.”
“Look, you’ve taken enough! Stop being greedy and step aside!”
“Can’t you see the kid’s uncomfortable? Stop pinching her cheeks!”
Frustrated citizens began to shout.
In the end, the woman had to back down.
I already felt like I had a strong fan club.
I could hear Bong Soohee and Han Seoyoung talking behind me.
“Where are you planning to get Jiwoo’s hair done?”
“I was thinking somewhere nearby. I know a place.”
Bong Sohee chewed her straw as she looked Han Seoyoung up and down, seemingly assessing her style.
Then, she shook her head.
“It’s bad.”
“Bad? What’s bad about it?”
“Everything.”
“…”
“Leave it to me. There’s a shop for celebrities.”
“Do we really need to go that far…?”
“We’re talking about an 8-billion-won face here.”
“Then, I guess we really do! I’ll leave it to you, Director!”
I was handed over from Han Seoyoung to Bong Soohee.
Did we really have to go to a celebrity salon…?
‘Things are kind of urgent, I suppose.’
This isn’t the time to whine.
If it can save the party, I have to do whatever it takes.
As we walked, holding hands, Bong Soohee asked me,
“Kang Jiwoo, are you excited to go to the celebrity salon?”
“No?”
“What do you mean, no? You’re practically bouncing.”
“…!”
It was true!
Without realizing it, I was bouncing as I walked!
Why am I so happy about just going to a salon, Kang Jiwoo?
At least keep some dignity as a presidential candidate…!
****
9% approval rating for the presidential candidate.
Although the chances of winning were close to zero, it wasn’t an insignificant number.
Earning the support of 9% of the people was an impressive feat in itself.
I was recognized wherever I went.
At that level, even the supporters knew the faces of the aides.
[Am I the only one who sees this as Han Seoyoung?]
Saw this on social media, but it really looks like Han Seoyoung, doesn’t it?
And who’s the kid next to her?
Is Han Seoyoung married?
What? Isn’t she single?
The kid is so cute, lol. Maybe a niece?
Why would she take her niece shopping during such a busy time?
Hmm, kind of suspicious.
The identity of the kid with Secretary Han Seoyoung began to be discussed among supporter communities.
And, as with any community, there were always trolls.
[Han Seoyoung turns out to be a mom, lolol]
What good is it to praise her for being smart and pretty?
Turns out she’s a single mom, lololol.
Dragging her kid around during the election campaign, ruining the candidate’s image, lol.
Don’t spread rumors.
There’s no evidence yet that she’s a single mom.
Just ignore the trolls.
[Single mom? Actually, it’s even better, lol.]
Who even judges single moms these days?
In the past, only old-fashioned people stigmatized them as immoral.
Honestly, being a single mom nowadays is practically patriotic, lol.
Yeah right, lol.
Even though their house is burning down, they’re still calling it a positive, lolol.
[Could the kid be Han Seoyoung and Kang Jiwoo’s child?]
What if Han Seoyoung secretly had a child with Jiwoo and waited until the election to reveal it as a fatal blow?
It doesn’t make sense otherwise, lol.
I told you it was Jiwoo!!!
So it was Kang Jiwoo, lol?
Rumors spread like wildfire.
The public’s interest was high due to the election period.
Just as the discussion boards reached a boiling point.
The party with which Kang Jiwoo was affiliated released an official statement.
[So Kang Jiwoo turned TS?]
Apparently, she has TS syndrome and turned into an elementary schooler;
The kid seen with Han Seoyoung was actually Kang Jiwoo;
What’s TS syndrome, you nerd?
It’s a condition where one’s gender changes.
Lol, who would believe that?
It’s real; check the party website for the official statement.
What???
Why is this real?
With the release of the official statement, both supporters and those uninterested in politics were thrown into confusion.
A presidential candidate turned into an elementary schooler in the middle of an election!?
Regardless of its truth, it was an intriguing topic.
[Reasons why the TS story isn’t fake]
Do you think the cold-headed Kang Jiwoo would pull a low-level stunt like this unless she got a bullet to the brain?
If this is a lie, I’m withdrawing my support for Kang Jiwoo.
Fact: Whether it’s true or fake, she’s doomed either way.
… Damn. Is this how it all falls apart?
****
Once the internet buzzes, it eventually spills over to the news.
Political analysts opposed to Kang Jiwoo spent the day attacking her, calling it “malicious marketing.”
-TS syndrome? Who would believe that? It’s viral marketing… a type of malicious campaign.
-This is a clear violation of election law! According to Article 250 of the Public Office Election Act, spreading false information for election purposes is punishable by up to five years in prison or a fine of up to 30 million won!
-It seems like candidate Kang Jiwoo isn’t in her right mind. I seriously recommend she checks into a mental hospital soon.
As the reckless comments poured in, tension filled the campaign camp.
“It feels like the public opinion is turning too negative. Is this really okay?”
“No matter how I look at it, this was a mistake.”
“We should change our strategy even now.”
Trust in the strategy was crumbling.
At the center of it was senior legislator Park Seokji.
“Who told you to put up Kang Jiwoo without consulting us?! Are you out of your mind?!”
Park Seokji, the party’s only four-term legislator.
Famous in Yeouido for his temper, second to none.
“Hey, Han Seoyoung!!”
He stormed into the meeting room, pointing fingers.
Even though it was an informal setting, yelling at a party member with informal language was extremely rude.
“Calm down.”
“What? Calm down? Haven’t you seen the news? They’re all gleefully tearing us apart! We can’t go on like this. Announce that we’re replacing the candidate. I’ll sacrifice myself for the party…!”
To “sacrifice” himself for the party by stepping in as a replacement candidate?
It was an obvious ploy.
At that point, people around him began to dissuade Park Seokji.
“Sir, please calm down.”
“Let’s at least hear out what Chief Han has to say.”
“Hmph…”
Though an unprecedented move, nominating an elementary schooler candidate would attract attention. But nominating Park Seokji was a guaranteed defeat.
Han Seoyoung tried her best to calm everyone.
“Negative news doesn’t have to be all bad. For us, this is almost a positive.”
“How is this a positive?”
“Look at the news. In this critical election period, our candidate is the only one being talked about. For a third-party candidate, this kind of attention is incredibly beneficial.”
A politician’s life doesn’t end because of a bit of bad press.
It ends when the public loses interest.
In that sense, Kang Jiwoo’s political life was still ablaze.
Park Seokji threw down a document.
“You still think that after seeing this?!”
It was a document prepared by Park Seokji’s office.
A trending post from the internet.
[If TS made things better, give it a like.]
Jiwoo-kan is just too cute~
I want to stretch those mochi-mochi cheeks and go om-nom-nom~ nyan-nyan~
Likes: 2,817
Dislikes: 1,178
The likes are higher, lol.
Wakakaka
Wooheehee
The lawmakers adjusted their glasses, scrutinizing the document.
“Om-nom-nom? Nyan-nyan? That’s one thing, but wooheehee? What on earth does that mean?”
“Huh… ‘Wooheehee…’ It sounds like gibberish. Are these real comments written by sane young men in their twenties and thirties?”
“Chief Han, as the new-generation expert, could you explain this?”
“I’m not sure either…”
It was incomprehensible.
Han Seoyoung didn’t know either.
It seemed Park Seokji, perhaps having studied it beforehand, had some grasp of the nuances.
“They’re mocking our party! Even the core supporters of Kang Jiwoo, men in their twenties and thirties, are turning their backs on her!”
“If that’s true, then this is serious.”
“They supported her because they respected her logical debating skills, so it’s unlikely they’ll accept a cute candidate.”
“Would they even vote for her just because she’s cute?”
With clear evidence presented, the party members began murmuring again.
Even Han Seoyoung clenched her fist as she read the document.
‘What do we do now…?’
She could no longer convince them.
Running an election campaign on cuteness alone?
It was already strange that they’d agreed to this plan during the last meeting.
Everyone must have been momentarily swayed by Bong Soohee’s strange persuasion skills.
“I’m telling you, me stepping up as the candidate is the best option. Frankly, it’s a stroke of luck that someone as prepared as me is available in this situation! Am I right?!”
“It seems logical…”
“It’s better to nominate Senior Representative Park than to continue with this elementary schooler candidate.”
“Yes! Chief Han! Let’s replace the candidate! Let’s start fresh!”
“No, wait.”
“The more we delay, the more we lose! We need to strike while the iron’s hot!”
Public opinion had shifted.
As Han Seoyoung was hesitating, even a scuffle broke out among the party members.
“What do you mean you’re deciding everything on your own?! Shouldn’t we at least hear what candidate Kang Jiwoo has to say?!”
“They say her intelligence dropped to that of an elementary schooler, so what’s the point of asking for her opinion?”
The meeting room turned into chaos.
Just then.
Click-
The door opened, and Bong Soohee appeared.
“Oh. A political battle royale? I almost missed something interesting.”
In one hand, she held a cotton candy.
In the other, a churro.
She wore bunny ears on her head.
She looked exactly like a mom who had just finished playing with a child.
“Director Bong, where is the candidate?”
“She’s behind me. Hey, Kang Jiwoo, free MMA match here. It’s free to watch, so come on over.”
Kang Jiwoo, who had been hiding behind Bong Soohee, peeked out.
“I’d prefer if they didn’t fight…”
Her face looked a bit scared, like she might start crying.
When Bong Soohee stepped aside, Kang Jiwoo’s full figure was revealed.
“Oh my goodness…”
“She’s so adorable.”
After visiting a professional salon, Kang Jiwoo was the very embodiment of a fairy.
Her neatly arranged pink hair.
A dress fit for a princess.
Her slightly uncertain gaze only added to her cuteness.
There was no cuter girl in the world.
No child actor could compete; she was an unmatchable level of cute.
The final blow was Kang Jiwoo’s trembling words.
“C-can’t we just make up…?”
‘We’re so sorry for fighting!’
The adults all burst into laughter at her innocent demeanor.
Even Park Seokji lifted her up with one hand, cradling her.
“Oh, how cute~ Shall we take a picture together?”
“Did you know Representative Park could make such a gentle expression?”
“Wasn’t he just angry a moment ago?”
“Maybe true power lies in cuteness…”
Not even Park Seokji’s stubbornness could withstand her cuteness!
It was as if Kang Jiwoo’s appearance could manipulate people’s hearts.
Bong Soohee reclaimed Kang Jiwoo.
“No photos allowed for a while.”
“What? I’m a four-term legislator, the highest-ranking official in our party, and I can’t even take a photo with the candidate?”
“No photos.”
“Even as an incumbent assembly member?”
“Even if Trump came, no photos.”
“Ugh.”
“Alright, everyone, attention!”
Bong Soohee smacked the podium with a pointer, drawing everyone’s attention.
Her actions were slightly rude, possible only because she had no intentions of staying in politics.
“So, who here wants to be part of the ruling party?”
Of course, that would be great, but how could a small party like ours ever become the ruling party?
“It’s possible, though?”
“Really?”
Bong Soohee brought up a PowerPoint on the screen.
A design that looked hastily made.
But the content was genuine.
-Reimbursement of election expenses?
-From now on, we make Kang Jiwoo president.
The goal was no longer to just recoup election costs.
The goal was to win.