Chapter 27: Big And Small Misunderstandings – (2)

“Huh?”  

“What…?”  

“Juri is quitting as a child actor…?”  

“No.”  

“Wait a minute…”  

“Is she really quitting?”  

I felt a sense of emptiness.  

It wasn’t something I had hoped for to return, and I had just thought of it as a temporary escape for one night.  

But the fact that nothing had changed in my life was disappointing.  

“Did my painting not move her heart…?”  

At the same time, I quickly understood.  

“What do I expect?”  

“I should have known better.”  

“Maybe I got cocky just because others called me a genius.”  

“I’ve just become a strange kid with the memory of an adult.”  

The pictures I drew didn’t have any special power.  

It’s laughable to think that I might have been a protagonist in a movie or something.”  

Along with the overwhelming disappointment, a small part of me still had a slight hope.  

“Does… does quitting mean something else? I think I might have misheard…”  

“I’m quitting completely as a child actor.  

I told Director Kim everything last week and left.  

Anyway, other than The Outrageous Big Family, I didn’t have any other formal contracts, and all the agreements were verbal, so there was no real procedure to go through.”  

“……”  

“I thought holding onto my career as a child actor, fighting for it with all my might, was the only path I had in life.  

But quitting was simpler than I thought.”  

“……”  

I asked again, wondering if I had misheard, but Juri’s answer came back firm and resolute.  

She still spoke with a relaxed expression.  

“I just felt something when I saw your painting.”  

“What was it?”  

“Well… I wondered if I was really acting like a professional.  

Am I just following Director Kim’s whims, not really understanding anything?  

Are these people really seeing me for who I am, or just the ‘Juri’ character?”  

……  

“…..”  

“So… um…”  

“…?”  

After speaking comfortably for a while, Juri suddenly hesitated.  

She then blushed slightly and lowered her head.  

Her hands fidgeted, and her eyes glanced sideways.  

“…She looks like a scared hamster.”  

On TV or on set, Juri’s intense eyes seemed to emit light, but when she wore glasses and smiled modestly, she somehow looked like a small rodent.  

“Right, she’s still in elementary school… Oh, will she be in middle school next year?”  

“…….”  

“…….”  

Juri hesitated for a long time.  

Then, she spoke in a very small voice.  

“…I’m going to try.”  

“Huh?”  

“Well… that is…”  

“…….”  

I didn’t rush her and waited for her to finish.  

Her voice was so quiet that it could barely be heard over the soft jazz music playing in the meeting room.  

But after mumbling a few times, her voice grew loud enough to be understood.  

“I’m quitting as a child actor.  

I’m going to start over and study again.”  

“What are you going to study?”  

“…acting.”  

“…..?”  

I tilted my head.  

“Really…?”  

She’s already a well-known professional with one of the best careers in Korea.  

I couldn’t understand why she would want to study from the beginning again.  

“But, Juri, you’re already a successful professional, aren’t you?”  

“…No, I’m just a lucky amateur.  

I’m not like real geniuses, like you.  

If it wasn’t for Director Kim’s capriciousness, I might not have even become a child actor.”  

“Well, if you don’t like Director Kim’s planning skills or training methods… would it be possible to transfer to another agency?  

Or maybe specialize in one role, like always playing a specific character…”  

“……..”  

I wasn’t sure if it would work to suggest that she specialize in playing a fool, but there are actors who have become specialists in certain roles because of their image, such as playing Nazis or criminals.  

There’s always a place for any image.  

I thought maybe I could suggest such possibilities to Juri.  

‘If Juri rushes to follow Director Kim to America without any vision, it will be like her past life again… but it seems like she has a will to change now…’  

Juri shook her head at my words and lowered her head in defeat.  

“Actually… after the ratings of The Outrageous Big Family tanked, offers like that gradually disappeared”.  

I guess in Korea, people want ‘Juri’ but not the actor, Oh Juri.  

So, I was thinking of going to America and starting over with the ‘fool’ character.”  

“……”  

“But.”  

Juri raised her head and spoke.  

“But, even that… I only know how to become ‘Juri.’  

There are many ways to play a fool, and compared to other kids who’ve received proper training, I don’t know much.”  

“……”  

“Just like how I learned to become ‘Juri,’ I think I can learn to be other characters if I study.  

It will take a long time, of course.”  

“Juri… actress…”  

“Still…”  

Juri spoke with difficulty.  

“Still… I really loved acting.”  

“…….”  

“I’m grateful for being able to realize that again.”  

“…….”  

It felt like something had been bottled up inside her.  

She swallowed hard and spoke.  

“I’m just imagining it, but it felt like the ‘Juri’ in my painting came to life and cheered me on… and I think that’s why I want to study, to create characters that can make people laugh, like that.  

I feel like I made something… something really good… heh.”  

In the end, a tear dropped from the corner of her trembling eye.  

“So… I want to start studying properly from the beginning, not as a ‘lucky child actor,’ but as a ‘real actress.’  

Thanks for showing me such a good painting.”  

“I see.  

You’ve made a big decision.”  

“…Yeah.”  

“Are you planning to attend an acting academy or something?”  

“…?”  

“I know some seniors who are studying acting, and I was thinking of asking for their advice.”  

I remembered Senior Kang Ji-na’s story.  

Having worked on plays and film sets from a young age, they would know exactly how to study at a time like this.  

Even just that small bit of help might make Juri’s life flow more happily.  

I thought it would be worth the effort.  

“Ah….”.  

But did I usually care so much about others?  

“……”  

I don’t know.  

“It’s not like I feel sorry for her for thinking she has no talent.  

The trigger for that was probably me, which makes me uneasy… maybe it’s only because of that reason.  

No other reason, absolutely not.”  

“…….”  

“Ha, huh!”  

“Don’t get the wrong idea!”  

“It’s not like… I was so moved by her tears or praise for my artwork!”  

I couldn’t let myself be seen as a creepy, unemployed middle-aged man who boosted his self-esteem by receiving praise from pretty girls.  

I couldn’t let myself be called a bad adult who secretly feels proud when kids call me a genius.  

“Huh, I don’t know about that…”  

While I was thinking this.  

Juri spoke, hesitating.  

“Well, it’s not an acting academy…”  

“…..?”  

“Next year, I’m planning to enroll here, and I’m preparing for the entrance exams.”  

“…Where?”  

“Here.”  

“…..?”  

Hmm…?  

“………”  

Oh.  

Ah.  

No way.  

“Han… Hanul…?”  

“…….”  

Juri nodded her head.  

“Ah, this is the school here.”  

After living a carefree life for several months, I had even forgotten the basic fact that this place was a prestigious arts and sports school.  

On top of that, the seniors in the dormitory treated me like a friend…  

Watching me in the middle of the day, Juri spoke with a shy attitude.  

“…U-um, unnie, Yujin unnie told me… you’re going to be here next year, right?”  

“Ah, yes. I’ll officially be in the first year of middle school starting next year…”  

Ah, I see.  

“If you enroll, we’ll be in the same grade,” I said. “But…”  

“…Yeah.”  

Since our majors were different, we wouldn’t be in many of the same classes.  

And since the dorm arrangements were also different, we might not run into each other often in this ridiculously large school.  

‘But I’m not a T-bastard, so I won’t say it out loud.’  

At that moment, Juri extended her trembling hand to me.  

The fear in her eyes was as strong as when she had thrown her bag away.  

And that expression was both familiar and unfamiliar to me.  

…Hmm, I wonder if this is what it feels like when you take the confidence out of Yujin unnie?  

Juri spoke with a shaking voice.  

“U-um, saying all this and… now… it feels weird. Umm…”  

“…?”  

“After… after enrolling, would you… would you be

 my… friend?”  

Juri’s eyes were trembling, almost as if rejection was the natural response.  

Even though she had been a popular child actress, she was trapped by her roles and the prejudices around her, causing her confidence to waver.  

‘Or maybe it’s the fear of having to start everything over from the beginning.’  

I grabbed her hand.  

Juri’s face brightened instantly.  

I looked at her face and said,  

“You can be my friend right now. From now on, I’ll speak casually. I tend to speak casually with my friends.  

If it bothers you, just let me know, and I’ll call you unnie.”  

“…Okay! I’m fine with it!”  

“Alright, Juri. Nice to meet you. By the way, when’s the entrance exam? It’s almost exam season, right?”  

“…”  

Ah.  

I immediately regretted what I said.  

Wasn’t I basically telling her, “You’re not ready yet,” to someone who was excited about the time they’d spend with a new friend?  

‘Inner T-bastard, you…!’  

You monster who tears apart a girl’s heart!  

Can’t you at least apologize?!  

“Sorry, I spoke without thinking…”  

“It’s okay, the entrance exam is at the end of November. I barely managed to apply, so I might take it a bit later, around December.”  

“Wow, do they divide people into groups for the exam? I heard the art department takes it all at once.”  

“Yeah, we gather in a place like an auditorium and do it in an audition format… But, didn’t you take the exam for the art department?”  

“I entered as a special student, so I took the exam early in the summer.”  

“Wow… that’s what geniuses do, huh?”  

“Oh, come on, I’m not a genius. I’m still lacking.”  

“And yet, you’re smiling.”  

Tch.  

This is why those with sharp observation skills…  

“Your observation skills are impressive.”  

“Hehe, really? When I was studying for my role as a fool, I watched a lot of Charlie Chaplin movies for reference.”  

“But with the entrance exam coming up soon, do you really think you’ll be okay? Should I ask the seniors for some tips?”  

“It’s fine. When we filmed the sitcom, I used to get the script for the entire week on Sunday and memorize it all by Monday. I’m used to cramming.”  

“……”  

“I remember getting slapped by the manager behind the studio if I couldn’t memorize the script in time… But I heard they don’t pressure you that much at the exam. It should be fine.”  

“…..”  

Ah, the child actor abuse issue from the early 21st century is coming up…  

I felt a little awkward.  

I spoke to Juri with a sense of sympathy.  

“Can we hang out a little longer today?”  

“Huh? Oh… Yeah. I’ve taken a break from school. I didn’t come here often, but…”  

“Then, do you want to walk around Hanul a bit?”  

“Can we do that?”  

“They don’t mind if you’re preparing for school. I even walked around here with my uncle as an excuse during the summer.”  

Juri nodded eagerly with a bright look in her eyes.  

“Then… I want to see!”  

“Yeah, sure.”  

“Where should we go first?”  

“Hmm… maybe the church in front of building A.”  

“That big church? Is this a Christian missionary school?”  

“It’s not, but the Hanul Foundation is kind of into European culture… and they can be a bit pretentious.”  

“…”  

I felt like Juri’s smile had lost a little of its brightness.  

But it soon returned to its original radiance.  

‘Maybe it’s because she’s an ex-child actress, her expressions change quickly.  

Her tone of voice is so mature, too.’  

When I was her age, I was still playing around with non-technical astronomy.  

And so, we left the visitation area, walking through the chilly early winter breeze.  

“The bread they serve in the morning is delicious, and the coffee is really strong. And they have big events like Christmas and Easter…”  

“I can’t drink coffee.”  

“Really? What do you do during overnight filming? Do you not drink anything?”  

“Barley tea… just that.”  

“Oh, that’s cute.”  

“That sounds weird coming from a 4th grader.”  

“But we’re the same age anyway.”  

“Still…”  

“And next year, we’ll be going to the same school.”  

“Yeah.”  

Juri smiled brightly and said,  

“When you say that, I’m really looking forward to going to school here with a friend.”  

“…Heh.”  

Hearing that for the second time, I couldn’t help but smile.  

‘Is it really that good to be friends with someone like me?’  

I really don’t get it.  

And so, the aspiring artist and aspiring actress walked around, chatting as they explored the school they would soon attend together.  

Spending time with an unexpected friend turned out to be more enjoyable than I thought.