Should I think this is a lie?
It was a bit confusing, but there wasn’t really a reason to call it a lie.
When we hugged, it was always a tight, definite embrace. I’m not sure if it was because we had feelings for each other or if it was just because we were happy that day.
Every time it was at my sister’s graduation, at my own graduation, and on our birthdays.
Whenever we hugged, we always held each other tightly.
…Of course, that was only when we hugged face to face. It wasn’t a hug around the waist, but more like wrapping our arms around each other’s back in a brief, innocent embrace.
Even if we both had feelings for each other, it never went beyond that. Usually, Mom was there.
It’s not like I’m saying Mom interfered, but still, I couldn’t kiss my sister.
Besides, I was a coward back then, so I never told her I liked her directly.
No, even now I’m still a coward. I couldn’t tell my sister I liked her outright, and I couldn’t even ask her to be my girlfriend, so I ended up saying those vague words instead.
Truly, the name “coward” was fitting.
“…”
Because of that, I decided to take advantage of my sister’s courage a little.
Slowly, I tightened my grip on her hand.
The outside was chilly, but it was awkward to bundle up too much. In fact, even if the weather really got cold, it felt a bit awkward to wear too many layers inside just because it was cold outside.
Even if it was cold outside, the inside was often warm. It was better to wear a thick coat outside, but keep the inside layers light enough that you still felt comfortable indoors. Not so light that you’re wearing a t-shirt or clothes so thin they show your skin, though.
…And besides, it wasn’t even that cold of a winter day.
My sister was wearing long sleeves, but they weren’t thick clothes.
As my hand slowly made contact with her skin, I could clearly feel her body through the thin fabric between my hand and her waist.
My sister didn’t have much muscle. In fact, she was less muscular than Fia, the weakest in the party.
It was only natural. Of course, someone who pays attention to their body might try to maintain a toned physique through regular exercise. There are people, regardless of gender or age, who find satisfaction in seeing their muscles develop as they stand in front of a mirror every day.
I’m not saying my sister was overweight. In fact, she was on the thin side. I even thought maybe she needed to gain a bit of weight.
She was thin. But she didn’t have any muscle either. So the skin I touched felt soft.
If I just moved a little higher, I might even feel her ribs.
Even though my sister wasn’t wearing anything particularly revealing, it felt surprisingly easy to imagine her body pressed against mine.
“….”
My sister didn’t say anything.
She just gently rested her cheek on my shoulder.
At first, we had clearly been standing side by side, but when I snapped out of it, my sister had turned slightly toward me.
Even if my side was a bit bigger, the height difference wasn’t that much. There was probably only a few centimeters between us. So for her to rest her face on my shoulder, she had to tilt her head down.
Her hair still smelled like shampoo, and I could smell the fragrant scent from her hair.
She wrapped her arms around my waist.
“Like this?”
I whispered softly, and my sister’s head moved.
“…Yeah.”
This was a lie.
But it was a good lie.
*
We stayed in that good mood for a while, but as customers started coming back, we slowly pulled away.
The sun was shining brightly outside. Even if someone looked in from the outside, unless they pressed their face right up against the window and stared, they wouldn’t be able to see what we were doing.
But this time, I decided to be a little more careful.
Just this morning, we almost got caught holding hands by the first customer.
There are definitely people who might dislike same-sex couples or who feel uncomfortable with a strange atmosphere. Even if the people aren’t complete strangers.
Especially since there were people working at the bakery, too.
“Hello!”
As soon as she arrived, Gayoung greeted us energetically.
She was a bit awkward at first, but she adapted quickly since she was smart, and soon got the hang of working at the bakery.
However, I still didn’t really understand why she was working here. I didn’t want to ask outright, though.
But a plausible thought did come to mind.
What if she just didn’t want her friends to find out?
If you work near your home, it’s almost inevitable that you’ll run into local friends. Of course, some people might enjoy such encounters.
But there are also those who are a bit introverted, or who might feel uncomfortable if their friends show up just to hang out while they’re working.
If Gayoung thought that way, I could definitely understand it.
The notes were like that too. These days, you can find part-time jobs online, but there are also part-time positions that spread in other ways.
Someone might have taken a photo of the job ad and posted it somewhere. There might be a cafe or a group where such information is shared.
When you start thinking suspiciously, your mind keeps going in that direction. But if you broaden your perspective a little, you can make an educated guess about why she chose to work here.
Thinking about things like “why would it be uncomfortable to run into local friends” can go on endlessly, but I’ve learned through my time as a warrior that it’s not polite to dig too deeply into someone else’s thoughts, so I decided not to think about it any further.
Even if I was wrong, it didn’t really matter unless the person told me. And I wasn’t going to say anything about the thoughts I had to Gayoung anyway.
However, there was still something I could say for sure after working with Gayoung.
She was quick to pick up on things.
I couldn’t know for sure how she would feel about my sister and me possibly being in a same-sex relationship, but if she noticed even a little, she’d probably figure it out right away.
“Did something good happen today?”
See? We hadn’t even said anything, and she was already asking.
In fact, today was a day Gayoung didn’t need to come in. It was Sunday.
But then, I got a text earlier.
[I missed a day during the week, so I’ll work an extra day on the weekend!]
I hadn’t expected her to care about the day we closed early to go to the memorial hall.
Well, thinking about it, it made sense if you saw it as a part-time job. Unlike a salary, if you miss a day of part-time work, you’d lose the amount of money you would have earned for that day.
…Though from her attitude, it didn’t seem like money was the main reason she was working.
“No, it’s just…?”
At her words, we turned our gaze away slightly and answered.
Actually, the two of us didn’t really have any reason to hide anything.
We’re not even dating yet. Of course, we can’t hold hands, hug, or kiss in front of people. Those are things that people who are “basically dating” would do, even if they’re not officially in a relationship.
But there’s no need to hide the fact that the two of us are going to the movies. We’re just two close people going to the movies together.
Plus, there’s a good reason. This morning, two tickets became available. Why didn’t I invite Gayoung? Because she wasn’t working today.
And actually, even if Gayoung were working today, there was no need to bring her along to the movie. Gayoung had been acting friendly with us, and while she was a close part-time worker, our relationship with her wasn’t as established as mine with my sister.
Just because we worked together and were a bit closer didn’t mean it was an invitation for a group hangout.
…And, I don’t know how my sister would feel, but personally, I thought it would be a bit awkward to hang out with Gayoung.
Gayoung smiled gently while looking at my sister.
Yeah, from the start, Gayoung was a little conscious of my sister.
…And that’s part of the reason why I’ve been trying to think hard about why Gayoung is working here. Honestly, the best answer would be to not overthink it, but I keep trying to come up with reasons.
The truth is, I feel some unnecessary competitiveness towards Gayoung.
Somehow, it seems like Gayoung started working here because of my sister.
I don’t know why, but…
So, if I don’t come up with some logical reason why Gayoung is working here, I feel like I’ll eventually show my jealousy.
“Who was that person earlier?”
…Honestly, it’s kind of embarrassing. If I do something like that.