“Uwaaah! Wait a second. Now that I think about it, Irene, you’re not even a participant!”
Elian coughed several times, desperately looking for water.
Unfortunately, there was none.
Realizing there was nothing to drink, Elian relied on her legendary crisis management skills from her hero days.
“Pwah! Now I can live again.”
…Which is just a fancy way of saying she drank straight from the tap.
By the way, that water’s source?
Completely unknown.
Is this really a game world?
Because as soon as we put some kitchen utensils in the kitchen, water just started coming out on its own.
Oh well, she probably won’t die.
After gulping down more water, Elian glared at me.
Now that I think about it, Irene really might be the villain? LOL
Elian’s eyes totally changed from looking at a friend to looking at a target for extermination.
(Elian emoji full of murderous intent) (Elian emoji glaring while holding a knife)
Next episode: Irene dies!
What the hell are these two even doing?
LMAO
Elian x Irene’s skits are driving me insane LOL
Why is this dynamic so funny? Why is this dynamic so funny? Why is this dynamic so funny? Why is this dynamic so funny? Why is this dynamic so funny?
Welcome to the denial phase of falling for them.
As I watched Elian’s reaction, I turned to Luminil.
“You see? You don’t have to eat it, Luminil. I already said you’re out of the game.”
Luminil hesitated, fidgeting with the plate that held a suspicious red lump.
Seems like she still had regrets.
I wondered why—
And of course, it was because of me.
“But… I want to try the dish you worked so hard to make, Irene.”
It was true that I put a lot of effort into this dish.
But effort doesn’t always equal good results.
Luminil, looking a little wistful, even picked up a spoon.
But before she could take a bite, I swiftly took the plate away.
“No way. I don’t want to see you ruin your stomach.”
“Then what about my stomach?!”
“Elian, you’re the number one ranked hero. You’ll be fine even if you eat stuff like this.”
“You really are a villain!”
“Thank you.”
Honestly, I didn’t even intend to torture Elian in the first place.
This dish was originally named ‘Pseudo-Kimchi.’
Yeah.
I was trying to make kimchi.
To be exact, I wanted to recreate the taste of the world I used to live in.
But as if things would go so smoothly.
I don’t even remember the last time I ate real kimchi.
And since this world lacks the right ingredients, I had to improvise with whatever I could find.
The result?
A hellish abomination so twisted it made Elian scream like a banshee.
Of course, she wasn’t completely serious—she was laughing through her tears.
I laughed too and replied,
“But you can’t beat me, can you? I’m stronger.”
I mean, she is the strongest.
“I’m stronger” (surprisingly, the truth).
Is Irene really that strong?
How many people in the world can actually say they’re stronger than Elian?
Well, for starters, her.
But wait, why doesn’t Luminil, the Demon King, just summon monsters?
Irene: Because I keep getting rid of them.
LMAO why does she only answer questions about Luminil?
“That’s it. You eat it too!”
Elian shoved a spoonful toward me.
Seeing that reaction, there was no way in hell I was going to eat it willingly.
“I made the dish, so why should I—mmph.”
I was mid-sentence when suddenly—
A spoon was forcibly shoved into my mouth.
Elian grinned at me.
But in my eyes?
She looked ready to murder me if I didn’t eat it.
How dirty.
Waiting until I was talking to strike?
That’s low.
And as I chewed on the so-called pseudo-kimchi—
It was like a meteor explosion of spice inside my mouth.
Holy shit.
I was dying.
I ended up coughing violently, my mouth unable to handle the assault.
The sauce I couldn’t swallow dripped out of my mouth, looking eerily like blood.
“Ugh… I suddenly feel like destroying the human world.”
Elian snorted in disbelief.
It seemed she was still reeling from the injustice of having eaten such a horrifying dish.
“You made this, you know. Don’t you understand that a creator has to take responsibility for their creation? And don’t even try to tell me you didn’t taste it while cooking.”
“I don’t know anything about that… Anyway, the ingredients came from the human world. And no, I didn’t taste it. Just look at it—anyone can see it’s a disaster.”
Controversy alert: She didn’t even taste it.
LOL she really didn’t try it even once?
Well, I guess if she made it in secret, she wouldn’t have had time to taste it.
If the cook can’t eat their own food, isn’t that just poison?
LOL
Just realized—was Irene actually a poison master all along?
The fact that someone like her is hostile to the human world is honestly terrifying.
If Irene had been seriously killing humans like other demons, the Hero Guild would’ve been wiped out by now.
Tbh, Irene might be scarier than even Fallen Demon King Elian.
LOL
FACT: Stronger than the Mirror Demon King.
…Is she really?
Whether it was because of the large audience, or because it had been a while since Elian and I had our usual back-and-forth, the chat was more chaotic than ever.
They were having fun like they were right here with us.
Even as I panted from the unbearable spiciness, I kept the broadcast going.
“Haa… Anyway… that’s the end of my special course. Now… haaa… let’s move on to the next challenger.”
Dog-rine
Pup-rine
Hey, “Dog-rine” sounds weird.
That’s why it’s funny.
Watching Irene pant like that is unbearable…
[User disntm has been temporarily muted.]
Irene: Big Irene Watching You
Wait, how the hell does she manage chat moderation while streaming?
After cooling down her flushed face, Irene watched as Elian and Luminil received the next contestant’s dish.
The cover was lifted, revealing an exotic-looking green salad.
Elian, intrigued, examined it closely before glancing up.
Of course, the salad’s owner was none other than Friss.
“Whoa… and the other challenger’s dish is a meat dish.”
“Yup! My absolute favorite.”
A familiar voice.
No surprise—it was Luna.
I had my suspicions, but to think it was actually Friss versus Luna.
It wasn’t a coincidence.
The Irene’s Cooking Tournament was structured so that contestants could challenge whoever they wanted.
They had both picked each other, believing they had a fair chance of winning.
That meant their explanations would be worth listening to.
I turned to Friss first.
“So, what’s this dish?”
Friss was a rather unique elf.
Unlike most of her kind, she ate meat frequently.
She also used magic instead of a bow—another oddity for elves.
But perhaps her most defining trait was that she operated in the human world.
Not by choice, though.
She had been exiled from her homeland and simply settled there after wandering for years.
It was ancient history now, but—
Even after all this time, she still couldn’t forget the taste of the salad her mother had made for her just before her exile.
After that, she gave up eating meat altogether, devoting herself to recreating that lost flavor.
She had spent years living off nothing but vegetables, driven by that singular obsession.
And today, she finally succeeded.
She was grateful to those around her—after all, when she asked for vegetables, they gladly shared whatever extras they had.
And in those unfamiliar greens, she had rediscovered her mother’s taste.
Just like that, she perfectly recreated the salad.
She must have been satisfied.
Friss beamed as she looked at Elian.
‘…What’s with her?’
Elian cautiously observed Friss.
Usually, she half-lidded her eyes, looking completely uninterested in life.
But today?
Despite being in a place full of people—which she normally hated—her eyes sparkled with excitement.
Something felt… off.
That unease turned to certainty the moment Elian took a bite of the salad.
“…This is so bitter.”
Right after an unbearably spicy dish, now came an unbearably bitter one.
Elian’s taste buds were practically going numb.
“How is it…? It’s good, right…?”
How could she ignore Friss’s desperate, hopeful gaze?
Even as the bitterness continued to assault her mouth, she managed to force a smile.
Glancing at Irene and Luminil, she saw they had the same reaction.
It was awful.
Bitter as hell.
But looking at Friss, they just couldn’t bring themselves to say it out loud.
However, that wasn’t even their real concern.
How are we supposed to judge this?
Luna’s meat dish was simple but reliably tasty.
But choosing Luna would disappoint Friss.
Choosing Friss would be blatant favoritism.
In the end, Elian shoved the decision onto Irene.
And at that moment, Irene braced herself.
Luminil was the main judge, sure.
But there was no way she was going to make Luminil the one to deliver a verdict that would earn someone’s resentment.
That meant she had to take the fall herself.
Just as Irene opened her mouth to announce the decision—
“Um… I forfeit.”
Luna suddenly withdrew from the competition.
(Angel Luna emoji)
???
Wait, the judging isn’t even done yet. Why did she forfeit?
Luna’s just too nice, huh?
She did take a bite of her own dish earlier, though…
Huh???
Irene immediately grasped the situation.
Luna and Friss had entered the competition together.
If handled poorly, there could be accusations of biased judging.
Just as she was about to step in to smooth things over—
“I tried both dishes, and mine was lacking in a lot of ways. So, I surrender!”
Luna had already preemptively diffused the situation.
Normally, people wouldn’t believe a statement like that.
But this was Luna speaking.
(Angel Luna emoji) (Angel Luna emoji)
Angel Luna-sama is divine! Angel Luna-sama is divine!!
Why is it “Angel Luna-sama” and not “Angel Luna-san”?
Ah… That…
(Angel Luna emoji) (Angel Luna emoji) (Angel Luna emoji) (Angel Luna emoji)
ANGEL LUNA! ANGEL LUNA! ANGEL LUNA! ANGEL LUNA!
With Luna’s devoted fans launching into fervent worship, the issue was simply buried.
Friss was declared the winner, and the room erupted into applause.
It was the same process as always—
Yet, for some reason, tears welled up in Friss’s eyes.
“…Thank you…!”
Don’t cry!!
I’m joining the Friss fandom starting today, No questions.
An elf’s tears…
Cry! Cry! Cry!
Don’t cry, Friss!
I must be insane… Why does this depressed, gambling-addicted elf look so cute…
I guess I’m insane too…
The viewers’ enthusiastic cheers only added to the atmosphere.
As the event wrapped up, Friss took one last bite of her salad.
It was still bitter.
“Irene… This is going to take longer than we thought.”
She wasn’t wrong.
Just finishing the first round of the tournament had taken a whopping four hours.
And they hadn’t even started round two.
With so many participants, there would likely be a third round as well.
Right now, public interest was high, and everyone was having fun.
But some viewers were already starting to show signs of fatigue.
This was the perfect moment to step away while the energy was still high.
And Irene?
She was someone who knew how to exit at the right moment.
So, before the second round could begin—
She stepped forward and addressed everyone.
“Everyone! Let’s wrap things up here.”
I wondered if I was the only one thinking this, but—
Of course, Elian backed me up immediately.
“Yeah, it’s gotten really late. We had fun, so let’s end it here!”
JMGWWD
As expected of Grand Irene, cutting off unnecessary dragging like a pro. LOL
Grand Irene
I still can’t believe Irene will stream for another 24 hours… Oh wait—
[User EIFJ has been temporarily muted.]
LOOOOOOL
Yeah, 24 hours was definitely crossing the line.
LOL
Fact: Even if Irene just streamed her daily life without talking, she’d still get at least 1,000 average viewers.
I’d watch.
Same here.
Most of the stream’s participants reacted the same way.
Not surprising—continuing wasn’t even an option.
We had run out of ingredients.
Now that the competition was over, it was time for the most important part.
“Now it’s time to reveal the prize.”
“Oh yeah! What is the prize, anyway? Can you even afford to give something to everyone?”
Around six remaining contestants turned to stare at me.
…Right, I never actually mentioned what the prize was.
Well, guess I’ll announce it now.
“The prize is… an ‘Irene Free-Use Pass.’”
?????????
Wait, what?
I should have entered this competition…
Yo, what the hell?
I’m actually amazing at cooking—damn it.
Why do YOU guys get to talk to and interact with Irene freely?!
I’m always donating, writing praise posts in the community, and eagerly waiting for her streams… Meanwhile, you barely even knew who she was!
Why isn’t that guy getting temporarily muted? LOL
I want an Irene Free-Use Pass too! I want an Irene Free-Use Pass too! I want an Irene Free-Use Pass too!
Aaaagh! Irene, please, give me a chance too! Aaaagh! Irene, please, give me a chance too!
The chat went absolutely feral.
Well, what did they expect?
There was no way I could give such a prize to everyone.
Actually—there wasn’t even a prize to begin with.
This wasn’t even a real competition.
So, I just decided to hand out my so-called “Free-Use Pass.”
Honestly, it was the best prize possible.
It was rare and exclusive—something nobody could normally get.
And anywhere I showed up, at least a thousand Irene-fans would follow.
Even for big-time streamers, that was an insane number.
For the small-time streamers here?
It was practically a miracle.
In short, this prize was a chance to gain exposure and skyrocket their popularity.
“Of course, if you don’t want it, you can just take 100,000 gold instead.”
I asked just in case, but—
No one refused.
Oh, and even though I called it a “Free-Use Pass,”
I could still reject any request depending on the situation.
As Elian looked at the pass, she frowned.
“…You can refuse calls, and people can’t freely use it. How is this a ‘Free-Use Pass’?”
“Scratch off the front.”
“Huh? The front?”
Elian made a confused noise as she scraped the surface with her nail.
A hidden word was revealed:
[Non-Free-Use Pass]
Yep.
It was never a free-use pass in the first place.
Did they really think I’d just hand out unrestricted access to myself?
Ridiculous.
“…You really are a villain.”
“You have no idea how long I’ve waited to hear those words.”
And so, the first-ever Irene Cooking Tournament came to an end—
With an outcome that left everyone satisfied.
Oh, and I didn’t give Friss the Non-Free-Use Pass.
“The Hero Civil War, huh…”
In a chamber lined with endless shattered mirrors,
A blonde-haired woman pondered.
“I suppose I should join. It’s a good opportunity.”
She slowly stood up.
At first glance, her hair seemed purely golden—
But strands of violet shimmered between the locks.
“Mirror… Demon King… I’m still…”
“Shh. You weren’t spared. I chose not to kill you.”
The Mirror Demon King.
At her feet lay dozens of corpses.
She walked over to one of the still-breathing heroes,
And retrieved an invitation from their grasp.
“Time to go kill her.”
“Never…!”
As the dying hero gasped their last words,
The Mirror Demon King snapped her fingers.
The hero’s body froze completely—no longer moving.
“Perfect.”
She donned a mask—
And her appearance transformed into the fallen hero’s.
The Mirror Demon King was no longer there.
“Irene. I’m sorry, but I will kill you.”