“Hmm, what?”
“Uh…” Lin Xinyuan’s little face flushed red, and her words became jumbled. “It’s just, this morning, that… what we did…”
She got stuck at that part, holding it in for a while, unable to say the word. In the end, she just blurted out without any context, “Was it your First Time?”
As soon as she said this, Qin Nanfeng instantly fell silent.
Sensing something was off, Lin Xinyuan’s heart leapt to her throat, thumping hard in her chest, a bitter ache spreading inside her.
Of course… she should have thought of this sooner…
After all, with someone like Qin Nanfeng, who had probably dated so many girlfriends, he must have so much experience—how could it be possible that he’d never…
Maybe he already had, long ago…
The more she thought about it, the heavier Lin Xinyuan’s mood became. A fierce possessiveness made her hate such things, but her feelings for Qin Nanfeng forced her to desperately compress any space left for this possessiveness to survive.
Self.
Zhen Xiang.
Two completely different emotions tangled together, making Lin Xinyuan feel deeply uneasy. Unconsciously, her arms tightened, hugging Qin Nanfeng hard.
It’s fine…
As long as it’s her after this, that’s enough… but… it still hurts so much…
Lin Xinyuan’s chest felt heavy and stifled. The intensity of her emotions compelled her to obsessively, compulsively think and struggle again and again, constantly persuading herself.
Her heart twisted and fought inside, and in the end, it seemed she’d made a choice… very reluctantly accepting this truth…
But even with an answer, her mood was nothing like before. It was as if a cloud hung over her head, refusing to dissipate for a long time…
But just then, a wicked, frivolous laugh suddenly rang out.
The young man laughed recklessly, his chest vibrating, and through their tightly pressed bodies, the sound carried straight to Lin Xinyuan’s head as it rested against his back, making her ears buzz.
Lin Xinyuan’s mind was still buzzing, not quite responding, still lost in her disappointment and unable to pull herself out.
A moment later, she realized that the jerk who’d made her feel so bad was actually laughing about something for no reason at all.
Why? Was he proud of it? Did he think it was funny?
As Lin Xinyuan let her thoughts run wild, Qin Nanfeng finally spoke. He kept his eyes on the road ahead, looking serious as he drove, following Tang Chengmin and his sister on their little scooter up ahead, but the corner of his mouth curled in triumph.
“What kind of First Time is Xiaoyuan asking about? I’ve been thinking about it, and honestly, I don’t understand at all. I’m really curious.”
Qin Nanfeng sounded as if he was truly asking, just like he said, but there was a teasing lilt to his voice that the girl knew all too well.
In an instant, Lin Xinyuan understood this guy was playing with her again. Though she knew it, she still couldn’t control the shame that overwhelmed her heart.
This stupid yellow-haired pervert really is the worst…
Embarrassed and angry, she immediately chose to shut her mouth and pretend to ignore him.
Qin Nanfeng wasn’t in a hurry either, just waiting quietly. He knew his Xiaoyuan would definitely give in.
Sure enough, it wasn’t long before the girl became restless again, her burning desire for an answer gnawing at her like thousands of ants, tormenting her heart…
Unable to resist the agitation in her heart, Lin Xinyuan struggled inside, but finally made up her mind.
“I want to ask…”
Her rosy lips trembled, and a crushing sense of shame overwhelmed her, making her words falter. She bit her lip, forcing herself to suppress the urge to back down: “Did you… was it your First Time… kissing me…”
Saying something so shameless was a first for Lin Xinyuan in her entire life, especially as a girl taking the initiative—she found it hard to accept, utterly mortified, her whole body trembling uncontrollably.
“Can Xiaoyuan say it more clearly? It’s too windy, I can’t hear.”
“You…” Lin Xinyuan was completely stifled. Flustered, she wanted to lightly pinch his firm waist, but the clothes were too thick, so she gave up, sulking.
Gritting her teeth for a while, she thought it over and repeated herself, this time with less embarrassment but much more decisiveness: “I want to ask you… your lips… was it your First Time…”
“Oh, that’s what you meant…” Qin Nanfeng chuckled, as if he finally understood, but he still didn’t give Lin Xinyuan the answer she wanted, continuing at his own slow pace. “I thought Xiaoyuan was asking about something else…”
Another reply full of innuendo, and the girl was at her limit, her pretty face blushing. But because she wasn’t in the best mood, she didn’t feel like responding to his teasing.
She muttered softly, not meaning what she said: “If you won’t say, then never mind… I was just asking, it’s not like I care…”
As Lin Xinyuan said this, she felt her heart twist painfully. The taste of a lie—especially one told to herself—was like a knife slashing at her heart. It wasn’t physical pain, but a torment of the soul, even more unbearable.
“Xiaoyuan.”
Just then, Qin Nanfeng suddenly dropped his playful demeanor, and on the handsome face hidden from view behind him, a look of seriousness slowly emerged as he gently called out to her, drawing her back from her gloom.
“Mm… what…”
Lin Xinyuan’s voice was muffled and weak, still soft and sweet, like a kitten sulking, the tone so low and forlorn it begged to be bullied.
“Do you trust me?”
Qin Nanfeng was a little stunned the moment he asked, his gaze flickering, a barely noticeable, self-deprecating smile on his lips, before he quickly recovered.
Her answer came almost without hesitation: “I do…”
Although Lin Xinyuan didn’t know what Qin Nanfeng meant by asking this, her reply was still heartfelt.
If she didn’t trust him, then after her complete transformation, maybe she would never have accepted his kindness from the start, and none of this would be happening now…
Qin Nanfeng nodded at her words, his tone relaxed, his expression taking on a hint of nostalgia and relief. He chuckled softly: “No matter what, Xiaoyuan, you have to believe me. I’ve always belonged to you, both my heart and my body…”
“There’s never been any dirty business, I’ve only ever had you. Do you understand?”
Lin Xinyuan rarely heard Qin Nanfeng speak so seriously. She could clearly sense the sincerity and reassurance in his voice…
That hidden, restrained affection wasn’t explosive, like a volcano, but rather like a cool spring, gentle and thorough.
At first, she didn’t feel anything, but as time passed, the chill seeped into her bones. Once it settled, it was like a maggot burrowing into the bone—hard to erase, leaving a deep, lasting impression. The yellow-haired idiot’s first kiss was hers…
In this moment, it was as if Lin Xinyuan’s mind had cleared. She finally got the answer she wanted, but she didn’t show much happiness…
Because of her personality, Lin Xinyuan was used to loneliness. For a long time, she’d poured her inner world into the Otaku world.
Influenced by novels and anime, she’d always harbored unrealistic ideas about love, and had a deep-rooted obsession with purity.
But how many people in this world can truly have a love untouched by any filth?
There must be some, but they’re extremely rare…
If two people can truly fall for each other and be willing to let go of each other’s past, focusing wholeheartedly on this hard-won love, that’s already more than most people ever achieve.
Of course, getting the answer she wanted made Lin Xinyuan happy, but honestly…
Her first eighteen years were so out of place that if some people knew, they’d find it disgraceful…
But Qin Nanfeng didn’t care about any of that. So then, what right did she have to demand anything of him?
So Lin Xinyuan felt she thought too highly of herself and regretted bringing up this topic…
“Mm… I get it, Feng-ge…”
Even if he couldn’t see her face, Qin Nanfeng knew Lin Xinyuan too well. Hearing her subdued reply, feeling her soft body pressing gently against his back,
He realized the girl wasn’t as relaxed or happy as he’d imagined. Qin Nanfeng knew this girl was being awkward again…
He sighed softly, “No, Xiaoyuan, you still don’t understand…”
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