My dragon horns weren’t grabbed as I expected. Su Liumeng didn’t miss the faint disappointment in the girl’s eyes.
Are my dragon horns really that fun to play with?
Su Liumeng was planning to give me a very big surprise tonight, so she quickly came up with an excuse, wanting to brush past this topic.
The girl’s emotions were still in turmoil, so she didn’t bother about such details and simply let her doubts slide.
The conversation was suspended for now.
Su Liumeng was giving me a moment to think.
As the helicopter’s roar landed on the lawn, I looked at the familiar building ahead, and a sudden wave of long-lost nostalgia washed over me.
I used to be more like a temporary resident here.
Now, this should be the little home that belongs to Su Liumeng and me, right?
I tilted my head.
But maybe not, in theory this is Su Liumeng’s premarital property, so what does it have to do with me?
But.
We never actually got married in real life.
According to the law of modern society, naturally it has nothing to do with me.
If Su Liumeng ever dares to be fickle in love.
I’ll not only take my daughter and remarry, but I’ll also forcibly split half of her property.
Never underestimate the ruthlessness of a woman scorned after losing love. If we go down, everyone’s going with us.
“Let’s go home, I need to rest for a while.”
The two little maids had just gotten off the helicopter, looking around with wide-eyed curiosity.
The nearby modern-style buildings, the green trash bins on the streets—everything was so novel to them.
Chunqiao had received some basic lessons in modern life, at least enough to use the basic appliances in the kitchen and around the house. That was why she could cook during the flight.
As soon as I walked into the first floor, I couldn’t smell a hint of mildew, not even a speck of dust on the floor. It seemed Su Liumeng always had people cleaning and airing out the place.
Compared to wooden sofas, I personally preferred the cushioned ones, and Su Liumeng’s house mostly had the latter. Even the dining stools had cushions attached by her, to prevent me from bumping into things if I was too clumsy.
Chunqiao was tugging Chunlan’s little hand, looking left and right around the rooms.
“Your rooms are on the first floor.” Su Liumeng assigned the two smaller nanny rooms to them.
“Thank you, Miss, for your generosity.”
I watched as the two carried their big bags, getting ready to put away their things. I pulled Su Liumeng to sit down next to me, “Su Liumeng, look—these two are the real primitives from a feudal society.”
The earlier question, at this moment, I already had my own answer.
“I don’t think of myself as feudal.”
“If I’m just a little conservative in personality, how can you label me a feudal fossil?”
“Maybe, being conservative is the norm for most people. Compared to my own normal, it’s just that you’re ahead of the times, making me seem less normal in contrast.”
I blinked my pretty eyes. My reasoning was sound, and I looked seriously at the girl in front of me.
“You… you’re right, too.” Su Liumeng nodded in agreement, “Being conservative is perfectly normal. You can’t equate being conservative with being feudal or old-fashioned.”
“But… is what you have ‘conservatism’?”
“First, you have to know, we’re already married. It’s normal for you to be conservative in front of others. Anyone would be. But what’s our relationship? Even I can’t get a peek, don’t you think that’s a bit much?”
“Sometimes, I feel even people in ancient times were less uptight than you…”
“If that’s not being primitive, what is?”
Oh, right, I’m someone else’s wife now… I fell completely silent, staring at my fingertips. “You… want to see what?”
Su Liumeng’s lips curled up, as if she could already see a bright future for herself.
Since this was the first time she brought up her request,
She was so excited, she didn’t dare to go overboard at once, like those weirdos who ask to see feet or something.
Such niche Xp, totally not the right time to bring it up.
Sixin Yan would surely retort, even couples who are married don’t chase after their wives to stare at their feet.
That’d just be handing her an easy opening.
In her excitement mixed with nervousness, Su Liumeng made a perfectly normal and reasonable request for a partner—one so ordinary it couldn’t be more ordinary.
“I just… want to see your legs, baby.”
My… legs? I tilted my little head, looking down at my long skirt. Ever since December started, I’ve always worn layered long skirts, loose and warm, and very pretty.
“Don’t you often see them in the summer?” My eyes grew confused; Su Liumeng’s words seemed so strange, not making much sense. “I often wear camis at home in summer, and my skirts don’t even cover my knees.”
“What kind of legs… haven’t you seen?”
Su Liumeng added, “The legs that everyone can see, you use to fob off your other half—don’t you think that’s half-hearted?”
“I want to see the ones others can’t see.”
“And I want to see… white stockings.” Su Liumeng finally revealed her trump card.
Wh-white stockings? Ah, how could it be that… I’ve never worn white stockings in my whole life… For some reason, I felt an inexplicable sense of shame… As soon as I heard those words, my earlobes visibly flushed red, and my voice stuttered, “I’ll let you see my legs now…”
“But white… white stockings…”
“Can’t we just forget about it…”
My head was about to bury itself like an ostrich, staring blankly at the patterns on my clothes, and a tempting pink blush crept up my side face—my inner embarrassment spreading out.
As a bona fide boy.
Even if—
I’ve now accepted my female identity, and even the fact that I’m a mother. But that doesn’t mean I’m calm about trying out various kinds of stockings.
Su Liumeng looked at the girl’s reaction with an expression that said, “As expected,” and even shrugged in coordination.
Sometimes silence speaks louder than words.
My gaze grew blank, my whole body jolting as if shocked, suddenly raising my head.
So—
Am I really a primitive?
No… I don’t think so.
I remember plenty of girls who haven’t worn stockings even as adults.
That doesn’t make someone feudal.
I opened my mouth, wanting to defend myself, but found myself lost for words; my mind was blank except for the phrase “I’m a primitive” playing over and over.
I could’ve used my past as a boy as an excuse, to justify my embarrassment.
But.
I’d long since seen myself as a girl.
Words like that just wouldn’t come out.
Because logically, it doesn’t hold water.
I’m already a girl, and I truly believe it in my heart, so how can I bring up my old views from my boy days? Is there any necessary connection? If you still insist on your boyhood views, how can you say you’ve really become a girl?
Of course, you could say views and feelings are different.
It’s just a kind of shyness—it has nothing to do with gender.
Since we’ve reached this point, another question arises.
If you feel that wearing stockings in front of your partner is so shameful you can’t go through with it, isn’t that the definition of primitive?
Yes, there are many girls who’ve never worn stockings.
But would they stubbornly refuse a partner’s request like I’m doing now?
Not everyone likes stockings, and plenty of people have never worn them—that’s normal, but it doesn’t mean they’d react like I am now, so ashamed they can’t even lift their head.
So my gaze went completely blank.
A truth I kept denying but didn’t want to admit was being displayed before me, clear and strong.
Su Liumeng’s wordless message in her shrug was reflected in my dazed, lost eyes.
Am I… really a primitive?
That question was no longer just a doubt, but almost a statement.
No, that’s not right.
I shouldn’t be a primitive. That’s the right answer.
Maybe I’m just overthinking things and got stuck in a mental rut.
I patted the sofa with my little hand, pulling Su Liumeng, who had just stood up, back to sit beside me, “You… come here, sit down and let me think things through. Let me sort out the logic, so I don’t get led astray by you.”
“In my mind, not wanting to wear stockings was never equal to being feudal. There must be something wrong with that idea.”
It was the first time I’d thought about it so seriously.
Unlike most people, once I start thinking, I dissect every level—from surface psychology down to deep logic—analyzing myself in great detail.
As they say, “The bystander sees more clearly than those involved.”
Su Liumeng gently reminded, “Not wanting to wear stockings doesn’t make you feudal, but the premise was that you brought it up yourself—you asked me if I had any requests. I voiced my wish because you led me to it; can you explain that away as normal? Besides, you and I are already Dao Companions, the closest people to each other. Even if I want to see white stockings, it’s not an unreasonable request, right? But you kept trying to dodge the topic, using all kinds of reasons to justify yourself. Isn’t that a problem?”
“Before you led me to say my wish, I said you’re already married to me, yet I can’t even get a peek, so you tried to prove you’re not primitive by showing something—then failed, and wanted to overturn the whole logic.”
“Baby, you can’t be so unreasonable.”
My expression grew complicated; I suddenly wanted to bury my head under a pillow.
Maybe… I really was being unreasonable.
But, women are born unreasonable anyway!
Su Liumeng clearly didn’t want to let me brush it off. As I was about to run away and ignore her, she grabbed my little hand from below.
I stared at her, as if completely defeated, and forced out a few words, “Fine, I’m a primitive from the feudal age.”
There probably isn’t anything
more humiliating
than admitting you’re a primitive yourself.
I bit my lip softly.
At that moment, my gaze, in Su Liumeng’s eyes, seemed a little sad.
In the end, I collapsed back onto the sofa like a deflated balloon, as if giving in to fate, slowly closing my eyes.
“Fine, I admit, it’s my excessive shyness that stops me from doing what normal people can do. If I take conservatism and rejection too far, it stops being conservatism at all. You’re right to call me feudal or primitive—that’s the natural result.”
I seemed to have always known this, just that no one else had pointed it out, and I was aware of it, clear and strong.
No one wants to admit they’re a primitive.
Now that Su Liumeng had analyzed it so thoroughly, I couldn’t avoid it anymore—it was like being forced to face your flaws.
“Xinxin.”
“Are you unhappy?” Su Liumeng gazed into my eyes.
“Did I go too far, pushing you to admit what you don’t want to face?”
Su Liumeng’s voice was gentle, afraid of startling the angelic girl in front of her.
“No…” I slowly opened my eyes, my gaze a little hollow, “I just suddenly dislike myself a little. I’m already married and still can’t bring a bit of joy to my partner.”