Chapter 36: Living Under The Same Roof (5) Part-2

“What the heck is this number supposed to mean!?”

Well, you’re asking me?

I can guess… well, not entirely, but a little.

These days, I’ve been feeling a bit calmer.

But the reason it hasn’t dropped below 80% is probably because I’m still in a very unsettled state.

But even so, I didn’t want to say that to James.

If I had to be unhappy for things to work out better, James would just use that to his advantage.

“Think about something miserable! If you don’t, this mission will fail! Do you want to be captured and become experimental material for the Galactic Federation!? You’ve already done something like that, so this time, the government won’t back you up!”

They never backed me up in the first place.

“More importantly, I don’t even know how to use a black hole after transforming.”

“The magical girls use it naturally, don’t they?”

But you’ve never been a magical girl, have you?

I swallowed my complaints and exhaled a deep sigh.

Well, yeah.

James is right. It’s not like I’m doing myself any favors by acting like this.

James has already set things in motion, and the magical girls are coming this way.

I have to move in sync with them.

I carefully set James down on the floor.

Then I took a few steps back and closed my eyes.

I thought about my current situation.

It wasn’t difficult.

It’s always easier to calm your mind through meditation than to dwell on bad thoughts before going to sleep.

I forced myself to bring up the worries I had pushed aside.

I imagined the hopeless future.

Unpleasantly, the circuits began to vibrate immediately, as if something powerful was turning inside.

And that unpleasant feeling dragged me even further down.

“Alright, alright!”

James’s encouragement was annoying.

How could I be happy about someone cheering for me to be miserable? I’m not some masochist.

I slowly opened my eyes.

The circuits were heating up.

Just that alone, I felt a much stronger power than when I was wrapped in the suit as a combatant.

However…

100%.

I still couldn’t transform.

Why?

“Transform! Transform!”

James shouted, but I couldn’t do it.

I recalled that moment.

I was hurt all over, and there was a net draped over me.

Not just any net—it was a heavy, wire-like net that could easily cause severe injury just by being placed on top of a person.

It was only when I was captured in that situation and dragged to an unknown place that I was finally able to transform.

To transform again, do I have to find myself in that kind of situation once more?

That thought made the circuits heat up even more.

The humming sound grew louder.

But still, there was no overflow.

Did James design these circuits with transformation in mind? It looked like that on the surface, but it might not be the case.

He must have known that the energy I generate would be enough to protect my body, but the reason he didn’t create a suit was probably because things were too urgent at that time.

So, originally, this wasn’t equipment for transformation, but I might have forced it to work in that way.

Do I have to be in more pain, suffer more, to make it work?

Do I have to face that kind of situation every time I try to solve something from now on?

The circuits were hot.

The heat felt like it could warm up my entire body.

But strangely, my body was getting colder.

I felt like I might just curl up on the floor.

But I knew that wouldn’t solve anything.

The chill was coming from deep inside my body.

It was cold.

“Alright! That’s it!”

I tightly shut my eyes again and clenched my arms.

Then I muttered,

“Transform.”

And—

Nothing happened.

“Transform!”

I shouted again, but still, nothing happened.

I started to feel anxious.

Is this it? Could it be that the webtoon, focusing so much on breaking clichés, doesn’t follow this one?

The circuits were unbearably hot, and my body felt cold.

Even without pressing my ear to it, I could hear the humming sound loud and clear.

“Please, transform!”

Even when I shouted, there was no response—

Ji-eun?

At the sound of that voice, I felt my heart drop.

I slowly opened my eyes.

The voice came from above.

Up there, I could see magical girls in all sorts of colors.

My clothes were fluttering.

Black smoke was rising slowly from the circuits.

It wasn’t perfect enough to completely cover my body.

Suddenly, I felt my pants being tugged.

Something was crawling up my body, and I could feel it—

“Quick, transform!”

James climbed onto my shoulder and shouted,

“If you don’t transform right now…!”

I had no idea what he expected me to do.

Ah, I just wanted to die.

I had tried so hard to manage myself in front of Hayoon.

I worked hard to look cool, in my own way.

Honestly, collecting music CDs was part of that.

I could’ve just streamed the music, but…

It felt more impressive if I pretended to know about it.

But, it’s all ruined now.

Since they were shouting about transformation and all that.

But it seems like there’s nothing like that in the magical girls’ transformations.

Then again, in the officially serialized webtoon, all the transformation scenes were skipped, but in the earlier versions serialized on the blog, there were characters who thought shouting during transformation was cringeworthy.

So.

“Ji-eun!”

When Hae-yoon called my name and approached, I squeezed my eyes shut.

In that moment, I felt my body lift slightly.

“…Ah.”

It’s strange, isn’t it?

A force that doesn’t move according to my will, continuing in a way I never expected.

The world in front of my eyes turned completely black.

Normally, when I closed my eyes, a little light would still come through, but now, in an instant, it vanished.

The voice calling my name grew distant.

Something tight wrapped around my body.

The coldness inside me reacted to it, slowly consuming me.

It felt like I was suffocating underwater.

I couldn’t breathe properly, and my chest felt tight.

Even though I tried to scream, my voice was completely blocked and couldn’t escape.

My ears felt muffled.

It was like being deeply immersed in despair.

Deep in the ocean, in a sea of despair where not a single beam of light could reach.

Inside it, I thrashed about.

Thud.

I had heard this sound before.

The sensation of the shell that had been wrapping around my body falling off.

The previously unseen world quickly brightened, and the breath that had been blocked suddenly cleared.

I took several deep breaths.

I grabbed my neck with my hand to make sure nothing was constricting it.

When I looked down, I was already wearing a different outfit.

“Great! Perfect!”

James cheered.

When I lifted my gaze, Hayoon was looking at me with a complicated expression that was hard to explain with words.

Cold sweat dripped down.

I wanted to get away from this place.

Even though I knew it was meaningless, even though I knew that what I had to do here was talk.

When I looked at Hayoon, it felt like my heart was being squeezed.

I don’t know why.

I just wanted to run away from here.

Maybe it’s because I’m afraid of her seeing my embarrassed side.

Or maybe…

I’m afraid she’ll scold me for lying.

If we talk, I’ll have to explain everything one by one—

Hayoon will definitely look at me with pity.

The humming circuit briefly stopped.

Maybe my heart stopped too.

The cold sensation sharpened my mind, preventing me from passing out.

I didn’t want that.

I didn’t want to be away from Hae-yoon.

“Jieun…!”

Hayoon turned toward me.

The magic girls nearby panicked and rushed toward her.

But behind me, a black hole had already formed, sucking in the surrounding light.

Once again, I ran away.

Just like I always have.